Flatline
by BME-GRL
Summary: The team receives a case that leaves Kensi and Deeks grasping for a lifeline. My first fic so please let me know what you think. )
1. Chapter 1

_Beeeeeep. _

A simple line oftentimes has no effect on the surrounding world. It could be a child's scribble or an English teacher correcting a grammatical error. They have little significance until that line is a lifeline, one Kensi had been holding onto. And when the loud and arrhythmic beeping that had her worried but still meant life went flat there was a continental shift in her world.

* * *

22 Hours Earlier

"Good morning, Sunshine," greeted an enthusiastic albeit late Deeks. Kensi looked up from her ever-present paperwork to see her partner's crooked smile and deep blue eyes. In an attempt to resist the charm she gave her classic Kensi eye-roll, but Deeks still caught the small sparkle in her eyes at his arrival.

"Yeah. It's always a _good_ morning once you arrive Deeks," countered Kensi. Deeks opened his mouth in retort when a loud whistle was heard from above.

"Gotta case, gang," shouted Eric.

Sam and Callen took the lead as Deeks grabbed Kensi's arm to prevent her departure.

"I got you something, sugar bear."

"Oh yeah, well it better be worth getting in trouble with Hetty if we aren't up in OPS like now," Kensi said glancing at her watch.

"It is. Trust me!" Deeks pulled a brown paper bag from his sack and handed it to his partner. She glanced inside to see her favorite jelly filled donut sitting at the bottom.

"Huh. Maybe it is a good morning after all, Deeks," she said while giving him a genuine smile only he can produce. Kensi turns to head upstairs and brushes by Deeks on the way.

_Totally a great day!_ thought Deeks as he watched his partner climb the stairs with a little extra sway she knew he would be watching for.

Up in OPS the two silently slipped in as Eric was describing the new case. Sam and Callen flashed a small glare in their direction, questioning what had held them up. Deeks just smirked and slid into place next to Kensi who was too distracted by her donut to notice their close proximity.

"Last Saturday Petty Officer Randal McCormick, 27, head of the weapons training was found hanging from the rafters in the training gym at Camp Pendleton. At first it was ruled as a suicide, but was quickly changed to murder when post-mortem trauma to his body was discovered during autopsy. Several large gashes to the head and torso were made after his death." Eric placed photos of a young, dark-haired man on the screen.

"So somebody hangs McCormick and then decides killing him isn't enough and goes for abusing his dead body," claims Sam.

"Looks like somebody had a real fight to pick with our Petty Officer," replies Callen as he glanced toward the large screen in OPS depicting the crime scene.

"Well whatever it was let's hope it doesn't involve other Marines," added Kensi.

"Miss Blye, I have a feeling this goes far deeper than we ever suspected." Deeks jumped hearing the unexpected voice of Henrietta Lange in the room.

"Hetty, will you stop using your ninja powers and make some noise as you enter a room!" Deeks held onto his chest, gasping exaggeratedly.

"Mr. Deeks, it is not my intent. Now back to the case."

"We have a murder made to look like a suicide, but very little evidence. It seems that McCormick was well-liked and admired by his fellow Marines. He doesn't have a disciplinary record of any sort and was a 'hard worker that did as he was told' according to his CO, Colonel Matthew Willis," continued Eric.

"Any family?"

"Our dead Petty Officer had a wife, but no children. Sarah McCormick was living on base with her husband but was visiting her parents in New Jersey at the time of her husband's death," reported Nell as she slung identification photos from her tablet to the large screen.

"Wow. She is _hot_! No wonder McCormick is dead. Person probably wanted his wife."

"Deeks!" reprimanded Kensi.

"Sorry," Deeks surrendered with hands at chest level, "I mean but look at the blonde hair and hot bod. What's not to like?" Deeks didn't react fast enough to dodge the punch Kensi had thrown at him. She got him square in the shoulder and Deeks stumbled back into the table.

"Oooow, Kens!"

"Ooops, my hand must have slipped." Kensi then turned her attention back to the screen.

"Are you two finished over there?" sneered Sam.

"Yup, right as rain here. Thanks for asking," replied a smirking Deeks still holding onto his shoulder, "Although, if you could tell Kensi," throwing a pointed look in her direction, "that is so not appropriate to hit co-workers it would be much obliged."

Sam rolled his eyes and turned to Eric, "Anything else?"

"Nope. That's all we got. Oh, except the wife got home last night from her trip. She should be on base now."

"Not much to go on," stated a slightly dejected Callen.

"Well Mr. Callen, that is where your job comes in. Now go!" Hetty turned on her heel and left OPS undoubtedly to place a few phone calls to Camp Pendleton about the ensuing arrival of her Agents.

"Okay, Kensi, Deeks you go talk to fellow marines who worked closely with McCormick. See if anyone had beef with him. Sam and I will go speak with the widow."

With that the team headed towards the garage for their cars.

"Please, Kensi," begged Deeks, "I wanna drive so badly."

"My car, my rules. I drive."

"Fine. But can I least choose the station? That techno you play scares me a bit."

"Why would it _scare_ you?"

"I don't know, it just seems so un-Kensi to me."

"Well, in that case no. I get radio too."

"Ughhhh," Deeks slammed his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes in defeat. Kensi glanced over and felt guilty for a moment about her harsh behavior toward her partner. She knew she constantly gave him grief and that he accepted being the butt of the team jokes, but always wondered if it actually hurt him. The flow of thoughts flew from her head as Sam and Callen pulled up next to her in the garage.

Rolling down the window Kensi questioned, "What's up, guys?"

"Just wanted to make sure you hadn't killed Deeks before you even got out of the parking lot," laughed Callen.

Deeks head popped up as he looked toward the other car, "Still alive, but slowly getting my soul sucked out by bad music." Kensi flashed him a glare and Deeks returned to his previous position with a groan.

"Okay, well you two have fun on the two hour ride to the base."

"Oh we will," snickered Kensi while patting her partner's knee. He just groaned again. It was going to be a long ride.


	2. Chapter 2

Finally, Kensi pulled her SRX into a parking spot on the base after getting through security. Traffic had been horrible that morning and the partners added an hour to their travel time. Deeks, in an attempt to escape the constant blaring beats of techno, had resigned himself to watching the scenery pass. At some point Kensi's gaze had travelled over to her partner to see him fast-asleep against the window.

_Must have been a busy morning surfing, _thought Kensi. Her partner, the avid surfer, always got up at the crack of dawn in order to catch the best waves before heading into work. Kensi had taken note that his hair had been slightly damp and skin smelled of the ocean when he had arrived at NCIS headquarters that morning.

_And yet he still stopped to get me a donut. _ At that moment Kensi vowed to be easier on her partner for the rest of the day. That was until he suddenly woke and glanced over at Kensi. A mischievous grin had spread across his features.

"Hey baby girl. Wanna give me a good morning kiss?"

"Ughhh, not really Deeks," Kensi let out an exasperated sigh at her partner's amusement and got out of the car, making sure to slam the door behind her. She turned to Deeks and hissed, "And don't you ever, and I mean ever, call me baby girl again unless you want to end up in ICU." Kensi grabbed Deeks arm as he tried to suppress his laughter and pulled him into the barracks.

The agent and detective straightened up and identified themselves as thirty men simultaneously turned to face them. Deeks scooted closer to Kensi as the men's eyes began to roam over her beautifully jean clad legs and up to her tight shirt never once making it to her face or her badge. Not a single Marine took a second glance at Deeks or considered his protective stance next to his partner.

_And she calls me a pig,_ internalized Deeks.

"Excuse me gentleman, we are here to find some answers concerning Petty Officer Randal McCormick's death. If you could please turn your attention away from my partner's ass and join us one at a time outside for an interview, it would be much appreciated," stated Deeks with a deadly undertone. Kensi looked wide-eyed at her partner's behavior and felt a scarlet blush working her way up her neck. It was Deeks' turn to grab Kensi and pull her out the door this time.

"Deeks, what the hell?!"

"Kens, those men had no inkling of respect for you in there."

"Oh, but you do?" Kensi asked incredulously, "You called me baby girl in the car and asked for me to kiss you!"

"That is different and you know it," replied Deeks, his anger rising. How could she think that it was the same thing at all? He respected her more than any woman he had ever known.

"Oh do I? 'Cause I always see you materializing women, but when those men do it, it's not okay?"

"Not when they do it to my partner," shouted Deeks, getting a few stares from passing Marines.

"I can protect myself, Deeks." At that Kensi turned and walked toward the first interviewee.

"I know you can," whispered Deeks to himself. _But sometimes I want to be the person you can rely on._

* * *

"Did you guys find anything useful?" asked a curious Callen while the team gathered for lunch in the base cafeteria.

"Not really. A few guys said they didn't care for McCormick because he was a teacher's pet but nobody ever threatened him. Plus, it seemed as though McCormick was a bit of a big leaguer and nobody was willing to put him in his place, especially with fighting skills," replied a slightly defeated Kensi, "What about the wife?"

"We had a hard time getting anything out of her. She is really distraught about her husband's death. It appeared that they truly were deeply in love. Plus it didn't help that she is four months pregnant. That's why she had flown to visit family in New Jersey-to tell them the good news only having to fly back for bad."

"Wow. I can't imagine," Deeks shook his shaggy head in sadness. The team was always surprised when this sensitive side of their teammate popped up. Always the joker or one to lighten the mood, but this new information seemed to have Deeks in its hold.

"Yeah. It's gonna be hard, but she's a Marines wife. She will have the help she needs," Callen stated solemnly.

"There was one bit of information she could give us that may lead to something. Mrs. McCormick said that her husband had been making a lot of phone calls, but wouldn't tell her to whom. She said he seemed secretive about the whole thing."

"I'm assuming McCormick knew his wife was pregnant?" asked Kensi.

Sam nodded his head in agreement, "Yeah, but only a few close friends knew."

"Okay. So let's get that information back to OPS and see if Eric can pinpoint any repeat calls made by our dead Petty Officer," suggested Kensi.

The car ride back to headquarters was usually quiet for Kensi and Deeks. Kensi was still reeling a bit from Deeks earlier outburst in the Marine barracks and Deeks seemed lost in his own thoughts as he once again stared out at the passing landscape.

"Deeks…," Kensi trailed off. Her partner slowly turned his head to look at her. Sadness and a bit of frustration evident in his ocean blue eyes.

"Yeah?" he questioned.

"It's nothing. Never mind."

"Kens, you can ask."

"It's just… I mean why were you so protective of me in there? I didn't need the help. I saw how they were looking at me and I could have handled it if it really bothered me."

"You aren't a piece of meat. They are Marines and they should respect women," Deeks voice emitted in a low growl.

"I could have handled it," Kensi mumbled.

"Yeah, I know that Kensi. You're Badass Blye. You don't need my help. But sometimes it's nice to know someone has your back. I guess I was wrong," Deeks face flushed with anger as he turned back to the window.

"Well, thanks I guess. I know you have my back. I just hope you know I have yours too, Deeks," Kensi sighed. Deeks glanced back over to his partner who kept her brown eyes focused intently on the road. His anger simmered down as he heard her words.

"I know." Kensi flashed him a meek smile at his reply. She had seen the uncharacteristic sadness melt over his eyes once more.

"Deeks, why has Sarah McCormick's pregnancy affected you so much?" She watched as Deeks' head shot up with surprise at her question. He had thought he had hidden his feelings fairly well. Leave it to Kensi to see the truth.

"I know what it's like, I guess." Kensi shot him a confused glance. He knew what it was like? What did that mean? Deeks expression was pleading for her to drop it, but he always pressed her so why shouldn't she reciprocate?

"You know what it's like?"

"Yeah, to grow up without a father figure. To have no man in your life to respect."

"Oh," was her only response. She wouldn't push harder for the moment, because she knew it hurt Deeks to recall his past, but eventually she wanted him to trust her enough to open up. Too bad she had difficulty with the exact same thing.


	3. Chapter 3

"So we were searching through McCormick's phone records," began Eric.

"And found that he made numerous repeat calls to a man named Kurt Crustoff," finished Nell as she flashed Crustoff's picture on the screen. He was a heavy Russian man with wild curly hair cut near to his head.

"Crustoff has several charges of assault along with weapons dealing."

"Weapons dealing," stated Sam, "No better place than to find military grade weapons than through a Marine at Camp Pendleton."

"How long have the two been in contact, Eric?" questioned Callen.

"A little over three months."

"Do we know if there have been any meets between the two," asked Kensi.

"It doesn't appear they have ever had contact other than phone calls, but we are looking into Crustoff's emails most of which seem to be encrypted. Maybe he is in cahoots with a bigger arms dealer and we can track down his next location."

"Good work, Eric, Nell," Callen congratulated each with a small smile, "Let us know if you find anything else on Crustoff."

"Will do," they replied in sync as they rotated in their chairs and began to furiously type on their computers.

The rest of OSP returned to the bull pen in order to go through what little evidence they had with a fine-toothed comb.

"Okay, so we have a pregnant wife that is now four months. An arms dealer our Petty Officer had been in contact with for three months. And nobody on the Marine base saw or heard anything going on that was unusual for McCormick who has been stationed there for over a year," listed Kensi.

"How is it that nobody saw a change in behavior? I mean the guy has a perfect record and suddenly he's taking up calls with a dealer and nobody noticed? It's not like McCormick was catching up with an old high school buddy," Sam question exasperated.

"Unless he thought it was an old friend," suggested Deeks who had been unusually quiet in OPS, "Or maybe McCormick is really good at acting."

"But fooling his wife would have been hard," countered Kensi glad that Deeks seemed to be returning to normal.

"Yeah, unless he knew she would be safe if he could hide what was going on. I mean, Callen, you said the wife mentioned the McCormick only took calls when she was out of the room, right?"

Callen nodded in agreement, "Yeah, she said he had seemed a little off lately but thought he was just nervous about becoming a dad. McCormick had apparently lost his at a young age and had told his wife on multiple occasions he wasn't sure he could handle the responsibility. However, when he found out she was pregnant he was ecstatic. He thought of it as a chance to prove himself, I guess."

Deeks furrowed his brow and ran a frustrated hand through his messy blonde locks as he thought over what Callen had just said. He felt such a parallel between himself and the dead Petty Officer. His actions did not go unnoticed by Kensi. She could tell he was still a little overwhelmed by the widow and her baby. She reached over and placed a hand on his forearm and gave it a tight squeeze in hopes to pull him out of his own thoughts. She couldn't figure out why this case was so hard on him.

"What else do we know?" Kensi asked.

"That we are looking for someone that is willing to brutishly murder and then defile a Marine. But they also need strength to be able to hang him from the rafters." The response came from Callen, "And Crustoff seems to fit that description based on his records and physical stance. But why would he kill someone he could potentially get weapons from?"

"Maybe McCormick wasn't complying to his demands?" suggested Sam.

"I mean it's possible but why wait three months later to kill him? Was McCormick complying in the beginning?"

"Eric said that there was no record that any weapons had been misplaced at Camp Pendleton. They were all accounted for every time," reminded Kensi, "So obviously he wasn't working out of the base if McCormick was supplying Crustoff."

"Not to mention everyone thought highly of the Petty Officer on base except for a few quips here and there. Plus his record is pristine. Why ruin that and a chance at being good father for a weapons dealer?" asked Deeks, "There was no money in it for McCormick according to bank records."

"No, but maybe Crustoff used a threat instead of a bribe. What did McCormick have that Crustoff could use as leverage?" Sam thought aloud.

Kensi and Deeks shared a sad glance and announced to the team, "His baby."

A look of realization passed through the team leader's eyes, "And he could still come after Sarah."

"Yeah, but why would he? It's not like she has access to the weapons on base," Sam inputted.

"Doesn't matter, we need to get her in protective custody now. Kensi, Deeks you go find the wife and take her to the safe house. Hetty has a key for you. Sam, you and I will try to track down Crustoff and see where he has been the last few days.

Kensi and Deeks once again were taking the long trip back to base when Deeks blurted out, "He never had a chance."

"A chance for what?"

"To be a father. I mean his wife said he was nervous but who wouldn't be? It's a small life in his hands, but he never got to prove his worth. He will never hold that baby."

"A man can be worthy before becoming a father. I mean, people admired McCormick on base as the good Marine he was," reminded Kensi.

"Yeah, but it's not the same. His child will never throw a baseball with his dad or ever be the lead in the ballet and have her father be her biggest fan. I just…I know what that feels like and it's not good."

"Deeks, I'm sorry this is so hard on you but why is this all coming up now?"

Deeks thought about a possible answer to Kensi's question. How could he explain to her that he wants to be a dad? That he needs that in his life to prove he isn't his father. Deeks stayed silent and Kensi kept contemplating why this was coming up.

"You aren't you father, Deeks." At that Deeks became alert and glanced over to see Kensi giving him a reassuring glance.

"I'm not so sure about that."

"Why? How do you see any similarities between the two of you at all?" Kensi's tone frustrated.

"Max." The single reply made Kensi fall silent as Deeks' face showed signs of hatred and disdain for his undercover detail.

"You aren't Max," Kensi mumbled, but somewhere deep down she knew that Max would always be a part of who Deeks was. The angry womanizer with no self-dignity. Max _is_ Deeks' father.

"Ha," a grumbled, almost hysterical laugh emitted itself from Deeks lips," I'm glad you think so." The sarcasm filled the vehicle.

"How do you think I created Max, huh, Kens? How do you think it is so easy to fall into character?"

Kensi stayed silent as she wasn't sure how to reply.

"I'll tell ya. He lives in me. I can't escape him. It's like no matter what I do Max haunts me and makes regular appearances in my life. I don't want that. I especially don't want him to overtake me. It's easy to become Max but very, very hard to leave him behind after an op. Tell me why that is, if I'm not Max?"

"Deeks."

"No, Kensi tell me," his anger at himself being thrown onto his partner.

"I can't. I'm sorry." Deeks just scoffed at her answer, "But I can tell you that you are a good person. Without a doubt I know that. You are a cop, Deeks. You save lives every day. And before that you tried to protect the innocent as a lawyer."

"Yeah, but all I've done is failed. Sam sees it. The guys at the station see it. They don't trust me and they think I'm worthless."

"Since when have you ever needed the approval of others to reassure you who you are?" Kensi asked with a bit of menace, "Deeks, those guys don't know you. _I_ know you. I'm your partner and I see what you do every day. That you would do anything in your power to help people without a second thought for yourself. I admire that about you. And I will defend you against anybody who says differently, even if you say it about yourself," Kensi trailed off as she realized how much she actually would protect Deeks if the time presented itself. He wasn't Max. He was Martin Deeks, LAPD Detective, and Kensi's best friend.

Deeks didn't look like he believed his partner but decided to let the topic go and gave her a small smile that didn't reach his eyes. Very rarely did he and Kensi talk about their feelings but when they did it was like a hurricane and usually left disaster in its wake. And yet somehow every time they got in the car today the feelings emerged like little devils haunting him. Too much time to think.

In an attempt to change the subject, Kensi asked him once again for Sarah McCormick's address on base and the two were back in professional mode, any lingering emotions left behind. As she pulled up to the ordinary house she sensed something was off. It was getting late but the lights weren't on in the house. As the partner's approached the front door they heard a window shattering in the back.

Kensi signaled to Deeks that she was going around back to check it out and that he should take the front door. He nodded in agreement. It made him nervous not to be with Kensi but knew the suspect could get away if they didn't cover all possible exits.

He quickly checked the front door to find it was locked. _Good thing Kensi spent so long training me in the art of lock picking_, he thought with a small smirk. Within moments he had the door unlocked and was silently stepping through the doorway. He removed the safety from his gun and cleared the foyer without problems. He then stepped into the dining room to the left. Once again cleared. That was when Deeks heard footsteps in the back of the house. Quietly he made his way through the dark to check it out. Gun raised he yelled, "LAPD! Drop you weapon!"

"Deeks, it's me!" hissed Kensi. Flipping on a few lights she saw her partner lower his own weapon.

"Did you see anything out back?" Deeks questioned.

"Yeah, a neighborhood boy decided to throw a baseball but it broke the window. He took off. I didn't see anything else, although the back door was unlocked. What about the front?"

"Door was locked. I cleared the first two rooms when I heard you."

"So why would the back door be unlocked? And why does it appear as if Sarah isn't home? We told her to stay here." Kensi leaned back against the counter, when she suddenly heard a noise upstairs.

"Deeks, you said you didn't get a chance to clear the whole house, didn't you?" Deeks shook his head and Kensi let out a curse under her breath.

Slowly the two made their way up the stairs, Deeks in the lead. He signaled for Kensi to go right as he went left. Deeks slowly opened the door to a bedroom that looked in the process of being remodeled. _Baby nursery,_ thought Deeks with sadness. He looked around the room and saw a few blankets and rocking chair in the corner. There were several stripes of paint in different shades of yellow as if the McCormick's were having a hard time choosing. Deeks heard Kensi shout, "Clear" from the other room, but was lost in thought.

"Deeks, you good?" Kensi asked as she walked into the nursery to see her partner standing there.

He slowly turned and offered a sad smile, "Yup. We're good. Must have heard a mouse on these creaky boards."

"Alright, let's get out of here and see if we can have Eric trace Sarah McCormick's whereabouts for us."

Deeks nodded and replaced his weapon at his back.

As they headed back to the car, Kensi felt some of the tension of the day ease when Deeks asked if she wanted to grab a bite at the local hamburger joint. He laughed as she order two burgers for herself.

"What? One for here and one for the road," she explained.

"And how do you expect to eat it 'on the road' when you won't let me drive?" Kensi's only response was to toss him the keys to her beloved SRX. Deeks smile filled his face and for the first time since that morning his eyes lit with their usual upbeat shine.

"Awww, is my Kensi going soft for me?" Kensi noticed the use of _my Kensi_ but let it slide, enjoying the banter that had returned between partners.

"Only for the night, Deeks."

"As in the _whole_ night," Deeks winked and stuffed more burger in his mouth. Kensi just smiled and settled into her fries and added milkshake not giving Deeks the satisfaction of an answer. The day had been tough for both of them and emotions were whirling. A little peace was very welcomed as they relaxed into the booth of the small diner.


	4. Chapter 4

The car ride back to OPS was comfortably quiet and Kensi dozed off to the sound of Deeks humming along with his favorite station. Deeks pulled into headquarters' garage and turned to glance at Kensi. He was about to reach over to wake her when he pulled his hand back. It was only on rare occasions he got the privilege of seeing his partner completely serene. Her usually wrinkle between her brow was soft and absent as her breathing became steady and deep.

_She is so beautiful_, smiled Deeks to himself. For a few moments longer he watched his partner undisturbed until his phone began to ring, which startled her sleeping figure back to life.

"Deeks."

"Hey, are you guys back yet? We ran a trace on Sarah McCormick. She appears to be heading up the coast. Maybe trying to get to a friend's or family. Sam and I are going to try to tail her. Go on home and we will keep you posted. Nothing more you can do for now until we can get her to safety. She may know more than she is telling us."

"Okay, thanks. We will keep our phones on us."

Deeks glanced over at a sleepy Kensi who gave him a questioning look.

"Looks like we get to go home for the time being, Princess."

"But what about Sarah?" asked Kensi completely unfazed by the nickname.

"Callen and Sam are chasing her up the coast. They need us rested but on alert should they need us. Told us to get some sleep." Kensi just nodded the wear of the day crashing down on her. She rested her head against the window and closed her eyes again. Deeks took this as a sign to drive her home.

As they pulled into Kensi's driveway, Deeks wondered how he was getting home. He could always take the SRX and pick Kensi up when the guys called, but he wasn't too sure on how she would react to the suggestion.

Deeks climbed out of the driver's seat and went to Kensi's side. As he opened her door he became aware that she was still sleeping, head tilted back against the head rest. He reached over her lap to undo the seat belt, but was quickly sent reeling as she grasped his wrist and twisted hard.

"Owwww, Kens. It's me!" With a bashful look Kensi released her partner's arm.

"Sorry. I guess I just didn't know where I was for a second there." Deeks continued to rub his wrist and gave her a playful pout.

"Wanna make it up to me? I accept a beer with my partner as payment."

Kensi staggered out of the car still half-asleep. Deeks walked with her up to the door and used his key to unlock the door. They had traded a few months ago in case a problem arose. Kensi smiled and invited him in.

"Fine, but only one, Deeks. I'm tired."

"Yeah, I can tell by the way you drunkenly made it to your door," Deeks laughed.

A half-hearted glare was the only response and it proved how worn out Kensi actually was. Deeks reached into the fridge and grabbed two beers as Kensi plopped down on her couch and immediately tucked her feet beneath her, laying her head on the armrest.

Deeks sat on the far end of the couch and sipped his beer as he handed his partner the other.

"Long day, huh? I mean two trips all the way to Pendleton and we still have close to zilch on this case."

A mumble "uh huh" was emitted from the exhausted Kensi.

"Kens, I can leave so you can get some rest," Deeks stated as he hurriedly finished off his beer.

"No, it's ok. I can stay awake." For some reason Deeks found that hard to believe. He took Kensi's hand and she unfolded herself into a standing position leaning heavily on her partner. Slowly they walked towards her room where Deeks lied her down on her bed and pulled the covers over her.

"Hey, is it ok if I use your car to get home?"

Kensi rolled over and patted the bed beside her replying, "Just stay here Deeks. If they call us in then it'll be quicker if we are together anyways."

"Are you sure? I mean I could at least take the couch…" Deeks trailed off, half-heartedly arguing his case knowing fully well that a few hours of sleep in a bed would be much better than one on the small couch.

"We are adults. Come on. Just get some sleep." And with that Kensi slid off her jeans from under the covers and fell asleep, leaving Deeks in a position in which he had never found himself before. His beautiful partner had just offered up half her bed to him and he wasn't sure if he could handle it. What if he rolled and touched her? He may lose an arm or a leg, or worse. He cringed at the thought. But yet again she had a point. They were adults and he could control himself for one night, right? He hoped that was true as he too pulled off his jeans and climbed into bed careful not to disturb his sleeping partner.

Sleep took over almost immediately.

* * *

A ringing was heard from across the room as Kensi woke and gave a low groan. _Must be Callen or Sam_, she thought. She rolled over and was surprised when she hit a warm body. Then she remembered the night before where she offered Deeks to stay at her place. She was in such close proximity to him that she could smell his shampoo and slightly oceany scent from yesterday's surfing adventure. Kensi took a deep breath, inhaling the comforting aroma.

If it hadn't been for the incessant ringing Kensi would have continued to snuggle into her partner's warmth all while secretly hoping he wouldn't wake up. Yesterday had been hard on their partnership…friendship? Heck she didn't know what to call it these days but she didn't want to make it worse by having him find her cuddled into his heat. But the phone had to be answered so she softly climbed out of bed hoping she didn't wake Deeks.

"Hello," she whispered.

"Kensi?" the voice on the other side sounded confused.

"Yeah Sam. What's up?"

"Why are you answering for Deeks?"

Kensi glanced at the phone she was holding and cursed.

"No reason. You got something for us?"

"Ummm, yeah," Sam still seemed a little baffled, "We found Sarah, but haven't been able to make contact with her. She seems nervous and jumpy. Always scanning her surroundings. She seems to be following orders of some kind, with very distinct instructions so we asked Eric to trace her recent calls. Looks like Crustoff is in control again."

"Shit," Kensi cursed.

"Yeah, shit is exactly right."

"So what's the game plan?"

"You and Deeks are going to tail her since she won't recognize your faces and G and I will be your back-up. Luckily Crustoff has her staying here. Get Deeks and head to Santa Monica Pier. She's been walking up and down it for a few hours. Looks like she's waiting for something."

"Sam, it's 4:30 in the morning. How are Deeks and I supposed to follow her without looking suspicious? Especially on a pier where nothing is open yet?"

"Looks like you're on your own for that. Sorry, Kens," with that Sam hung up.

Kensi turned back to Deeks' sleeping form, reluctant to wake him. They had only been asleep a few hours and he looked so peaceful lying there. Deeks may have always been the light-hearted one on the team but occasionally he got a haunted look, but here sleeping he looked as if his whole world was right. The fact that he was content and at home in her bed enough to fully relax made a smile work its way across Kensi's face.

"I can hear you thinking about my sexy body being in your bed, Fern." Kensi jumped a bit at the sound of Deeks voice, gravelly from disuse.

"Sexy. Pshhh," Kensi retorted, but the blush creeping its way up her neck gave away her true thoughts. She was glad to be concealed by the darkness of early morning.

Deeks rolled over and smiled genuinely at Kensi, before getting up," I assume that was a 'get your ass here now' phone call?"

"Sounds about right, partner." Deeks stretched revealing a small sliver of toned stomach to Kensi and she had to quickly avert her eyes to keep from staring. Deeks eyes shifted to her and widened a bit. She soon realized she was standing in front of her partner in nothing but a shirt and underwear and reached for the jeans she had tossed the night before. Hastily pulling them on in order to escape the awkwardness that had settled between the two, she said, "We are to be at Santa Monica ASAP. Apparently Crustoff has Sarah in his control and she has been there pacing for hours. We are to keep tabs on her until we find out what she is doing."

"It's 4:30. Kinda hard to keep tabs on a person when nobody else is around to blend in with."

"My thoughts exactly." Suddenly she had an idea of a pretty good cover, "Hey Deeks, how would you like to go surfing this glorious morning?"

Deeks smiled and replied, "Me? I'll surf and you can watch my luscious and agile body from up on the peer. Good plan, Kensalina."

"Glad to help," Kensi laughed. The morning had started off well between the two of them and she hoped the day would continue just as smoothly.

Kensi and Deeks stopped by his house for him to grab his board and wetsuit. Thankfully an elderly neighbor had taken Monty last night when she didn't see Deeks come home. It was a good system they had set up. Deeks rushed back down to Kensi's car since they needed to make it to the pier as quickly as they could. Thankfully LA traffic wasn't horrible at five in the morning and they made it there in record time.

Deeks hopped out of the SRX and untied his board and hauled it to the sand. There he pulled his wetsuit up and over his shoulder from its previous position around his hips. Kensi attempted to look away but was ensnared by the ripple of the muscles in his back as he guided his arms into the suit. God, he was sexy. Deeks was hyperaware of Kensi's stares but pretended not to notice in order for the moment to continue.

Turning around to face her Deeks said, "All right Kens, I'll be down here surfing and you can wander up to the pier pretending to watch from above. Find Sarah and keep an eye on her. Maybe Crustoff will show up and this will be an easy close to a case. Catch him, see if he'll confess to the murder or at least know who is involved. Easy peezy lemon squeezy."

"Did you really just say that?" Kensi asked with a bellowing laugh.

"Sho did."

"Oh my gosh Deeks stop. You are soooo not cool," but Kensi couldn't control her laughter as she bent over at the waist hugging her sides. Deeks loved that he could pull this reaction from the ever put-together Kensi Marie Blye.

"Well, go on lover-girl and watch as your man pulls out his best tricks," Deeks gave a now slightly sobered Kensi a pat on the butt and headed off into the waves with his board. Kensi just shook her heard in amusement_. Now to go find Sarah McCormick_, she thought.

Once Kensi was up on the pier spotting Sarah was easy. She could see the pregnant women from her position by the railing, pretending to watch Deeks. Kensi would cautiously glance toward Sarah every few minutes to keep track of her but had to admit watching Deeks riding the perfect waves was a lot more entertaining. The grace and power in which he surfed showed he had truly mastered the art. His body was stable yet strong as he repeatedly rode out the waves. Kensi could tell even from her spot high above the Deeks was smiling and enjoying every moment of this op. It wasn't often he could use his surfing skills while on the job.

A little over an hour had passed when a dark van pulled into a parking spot near the entrance of the pier. Kensi saw Sarah's eyes flash up as the headlights lit the area. Deeks had also noticed the car and decided to head into shore knowing Kensi would be needing back-up.

Five men exited the vehicle and made their way down the walkway toward Sarah. As they passed Kensi the one appearing to be in charged stopped.

"May want to scram now, princess. Wouldn't want a pretty little thing like you to get hurt in these kinds of situations." His words sent chills down Kensi's spine and she let them show in order to play her part. She then took off toward Deeks on the beach pretending to flee.

The men continued on their path toward Sarah, obviously pleased with being able to scare Kensi away. Kensi reached Deeks.

"Definitely Crustoff. Recognized him from his pictures. He has four goons with him. Couldn't tell if they were carrying. We better get up there fast in order to maintain control of the situation. I'll call in Sam and Callen for back-up as you get dressed. Deeks nodded and began to peel his wetsuit off and towel dry his hair. He had grabbed his extra go-bag from his apartment that morning and changed into some dry clothes, placing his gun at his back and badge on his waist. Both he and Kensi placed comms in their ears.

"The guys are on their way in now, Deeks," Kensi murmured.

"Got it." With that exchange the two silently made their way back to the pier to get visual on Sarah. Since the men wouldn't recognize Deeks he was the one to make his way casually toward Sarah to see if he could hear anything being said and process the possible threats to the young woman. Kensi stayed back and waited for back-up.

"Now you do what I tell you or the baby will not survive," Crustoff hissed at a cowering Sarah.

"But I-I can't. I d-don't have the access. You killed Randy didn't you?" Sarah cried loudly obviously scared but willing to fight a little.

"Sure did, bitch. He wouldn't agree to my plan even after I threatened you and the baby. Well he almost did but couldn't follow through, poor bastard. He sent you away for the weekend of the meet to try and protect you. Ha, what good that did! Tried to fight. Tried to get help, but I silenced him long before he had the chance," Crustoff sneered wildly. " All I wanted was a few measly weapons and he couldn't pull through. I did the hard part…sneaking onto a fucking military base and he still couldn't do it. Too 'honorable' to betray his country. Too bad it looks like he left his problems for you to deal with, sweetheart." Crustoff reached for Sarah's face to caress with calloused fingers but she pulled away sharply.

"Do. Not. Touch. Me."

"Oooh, the Marine's wife has got some spunk. Wanna show me more of that later?" Crustoff laughed and his men joined in, clearly enjoying the fear they had placed in the woman. They each took turns passing her around and groping her small frame. Deeks had had enough.

"Kens, I've got Crustoff where we need him. He has already admitted to murder and blackmail. Is back-up ready?" Silence was the only response heard through the earwig. "Kensi, are you there?" Deeks quickly checked behind him but it was too dark to make out the end of the pier.

_Guess I'm in this alone for now_. Little did he know that Kensi had heard every word but her mic didn't seem to be working.

"Shit!" she screamed. Deeks was going to go in there without back-up. Sam and Callen hadn't arrived yet and she had lost any way to communicate that to Deeks. He was going on blind trust that she would have his back.

Kensi started to make her way down the pier slowly toward the gathering mass when she suddenly heard a scream and a flash of gunfire. Suddenly she had whipped out her gun and sprinted down toward the fight.

Deeks had made the first move. He flashed his badge at the group and identified himself. Crustoff didn't take too kindly to the interruption and quickly pulled a gun to Sarah's head while holding her under his arm. His goons all pulled weapons of their own on Deeks.

_Come on Kensi. A little help._ He soon realized what a bad position he had put himself in. It was unlikely he had any back up since the comms weren't functioning properly and he had a trapped pregnant woman and four guns pointed at his head.

_Think Deeks. Think,_ he chastised. First priority: Sarah. Second: stay alive and capture Crustoff. A lot easier said than done.

"Alright, calm down. Calm down. Everybody just lower your weapons. I don't want to make a scene. Just hand the woman over to me and put the weapons down. Maybe I can cut you a deal."

Crustoff just laughed and grasped Sarah around the throat tighter, fear very obvious in her blue eyes.

"Cut us a deal? Ha. Why do you think we would want or are going to need said deals, detective? And don't you fellows always have back-up. Where are they?" Crustoff clearly was enjoying the vulnerability that Deeks had placed on himself.

"Fine. If you want to do this the hard way we can do this the hard way." Deeks quickly fired several rounds into the first two henchmen before anyone else could take any shots. Crustoff seemed unfazed by the death of his men and stood still all the while holding the gun to Sarah's head. The other two men didn't take as kindly to the kills, however, and shot back at Deeks. Not to Deeks' surprise, all the shots went wide and he was able to fire off two more rounds that took out the last of the men.

"You are a very good shot, Detective. Are you sure you do not wish to join my team instead? I guarantee you that the pay is much heftier."

"No thanks. I'm good," spat Deeks as he leveled his gun back at Crustoff.

"As you wish. You still have a problem though, Detective."

"Yeah. You."

"Aw. Very good, Detective. You shoot me I kill her."

Deeks really hoped that Kensi was on her way and would be able to save his sorry ass from the predicament he now faced. As if God was answering a prayer she came up behind him weapon ready.

"NCIS. Drop the weapon and release the woman."

"Uh uh uh. I don't think so. She is worth too much to me."

Deeks and Kensi shared a look and silently created a plan. Deeks would charge Crustoff hopefully throwing him off enough to release Sarah to the waiting Kensi. Kensi would provide his backup and try to shoot Crustoff as soon as Sarah was clear from danger. It was a good plan…if it worked.

Suddenly Deeks threw himself at Crustoff who in turn tossed Sarah aside as planned. Kensi gather the trembling woman and pulled her back from the ongoing fight. Kensi steadied her gun but was unable to get an accurate shot. Deeks kept getting in the way throughout the struggle.

"Deeks back away. I can get a shot," Kensi shouted into the chaos. Deeks turned toward her momentarily releasing hold of Crustoff's hand which held his weapon. He tried to back away but was too slow. Kensi got off two kill shots into Crustoff's center mass but not before he had the chance to fire his own.

Kensi thought the man's shots had gone wide until she saw the disbelief and pain in her partner's eyes as he dropped to the walkway below him.


	5. Chapter 5

"Deeeeeks!" Kensi's voice rung in her ears. She was frozen in shock. Her partner falling to the ground on replay in her mind.

"Detective?" came a quiet murmur behind her.

_Shit! Sarah_, Kensi had to get her out of there. Pressing into comms praying Eric would hear she shouted, "Eric, I need an ambulance now!"

A red sunburst was quickly spreading over Deeks shirt, and Sarah was still curled into the sidewalk in fear. Kensi was on her own. Trying to stay professional she looked towards the woman first.

"Sarah, I need you to be calm, okay? Can you do that for me and for the safety of your baby?" Kensi caught the woman's small nodded reply. "I have to help my partner. Are you injured in any way?" Again a silent reply but this time a negative affirmation.

_Good. At least I can focus on Deeks._

Kensi regained control of her body and ran for Deeks. Her knees hit the ground with a loud thud and she knew there would be bruises to prove her landing later, but at the moment her focus was on her partner. Deeks' shirt had a red stain that was beginning to sunburst outward. It wasn't until Kensi placed her quivering hands over the wound hoping to stop some of the blood flow that she noticed a second pool of blood spilling from his right thigh.

He was losing too much blood. It had thoroughly soaked her nimble fingers and spread across the wooden planks of the pier. She had to try to put pressure on Deeks' leg as well. Making a quick decision she straddled his leg and squeezed hoping that the compromising position may help. Her partner began convulsing under her touch but never regained consciousness.

Softly, Kensi spoke to Sarah trying not to startle the woman, "Sarah, grab my phone from my pocket and call 9-11. I have lost contact with my team and we need help now!" Sarah complied to the agent's demands.

Leaning forward Kensi whispered," Deeks, I need you to wake up. You made me a promise. Do you remember that, Deeks? You said you wouldn't ever die."

As Kensi began to lose whatever composure that had come with the adrenaline rush, the sounds of sirens blared softly in the distance.

"See, Deeks. Just hold on. We are going to get you to a hospital." Kensi was becoming frantic as she felt her partner's blood cover her hands and spread along the pavement in a deep pool that gathered where she was kneeling, soaking her jeans. Suddenly, the agent felt her partner's slowing but steady heartbeat falter beneath her fingers. Kensi lost any composure she may have had only moments before. Time was running out.

Sarah just sat in shock. As the ambulance pulled up to the scene the paramedics ran to her to check vitals, but she quickly pointed with a trembling hand to the detective being hidden from view by a shaking Kensi.

"No. No! Check him please. So much blood," the end of Sarah's statement was barely even a whisper.

Kensi began to scream, "Help him! I can't hold on much longer and he's losing blood. Please just help him." Kensi was frantic and unprofessional, but she didn't care. All she cared about was preventing her partner from painting the whole pier red as his life slipped from him.

As the paramedics took over they shared a look of defeat as they felt the dying pulse of the detective. It didn't look good. The two medical professionals worked quickly and quietly to get Deeks strapped to a gurney and prepared for travel.

Rapid footfalls were heard rushing the scene from behind. Kensi grew wide-eyed and drew her weapon spinning on the spot. Callen and Sam were shocked to see their teammate pointing a trembling gun in their direction with crazed eyes. Not only that but her hands were dripping with a thick red liquid that shimmered in the early morning light.

"Kens, what the hell?!" Callen shouted, hands in the air. It took a second for recognition to hit Kensi's large eyes as she kept the weapon raised. Sam slowly approached the agent and grabbed her gun from her slipping hold.

"What in God's name…" Callen trailed off as he saw the scene before him for the first time. Sarah sat against the railing of the pier while two medics shoved the last bit of Deeks' gurney into the awaiting ambulance.

"Kens, what happened?" Sam used a firm but quiet tone with the woman who was going into shock,

"I-I can't. I can't," she walked backwards a few feet before turning and stumbling to the ambulance that held her partner. The medics allowed her to board without a fight once they saw her state of distress.

_Hold it together. Hold it together. You are no use to him this way._ But the harder Kensi fought to keep a level head the faster she lost grasp of it.

As the heart monitor was attached to Deeks, Kensi sighed in relief that it was still beeping, fragile and unsteady but beeping.

They were a few minutes from the closest hospital when Kensi felt her heart drop. That beautiful wavy line, no matter how erratic and unstable, flattened and became a low, monotone _beeeeeep._

"No! You have to do something please…please," Kensi begged for the paramedic to save her partner's life.

"Please, ma'am. We are trying, but he has lost too much blood." At that Kensi silently wept into her palms as the man frantically tried to revive and stabilize Deeks. Several minutes had passed and that damn monotone sound continued.

She watched him die. This close to the hospital she watched him die.

As the ambulance pulled up, the doors were flung open and Deeks was suddenly surrounded by dozens of people. Kensi was lost in the fray as he was whisked down the hall, doctors shouting orders and nurses giving data. Then silence. The doors to ICU closed and Kensi slumped to the floor.

Several minutes later Sam and Callen entered with an unstable Sarah, from whom they had gotten details of the morning's events on the ride over. Taking note of Kensi's state they quickly left the pregnant woman with a nurse. Kensi was covered from head to toe in her partner's blood curled in on herself in the middle of the hallway. As Sam and Callen tried to pull her to her feet she fought, screaming and kicking at them. The head nurse walked over to the struggling men and asked them to leave.

"You are disrupting the other's," she harshly chastised. Sam thought he was going to have to let go of Kensi in order to restrain Callen from lashing out on the woman.

"We are trying. She just watched her partner get shot...give her a break," Callen returned the harsh tone as he maintained his grasp on Kensi who was slowly giving up her fight and slumping against the two men.

"Dead," she mumbled.

"What, Kens?" Sam leaned closer to hear what Kensi seemed to be saying on repeat.

"He's dead. I watched him die. Not just get shot. I watched him die. And it's my fault. Back-up," Kensi scoffed at herself. Her teammates exchanged glances as they walked her back outside of the hospital doors.

Callen pulled her over to a bench where they could rest. Kensi once again curled up into a ball, her head in Callen's lap and feet resting in Sam's. The two had never seen her this emotional before and were not sure how to handle the situation. Kensi's sobs slowed down put were replaced by continuous shaking as if she were suffering from extreme cold.

"Sam, I think she's going into shock. We need to get her cleaned up. She needs to wash the blood from her." Sam nodded in agreement and left Kensi with Callen so he could grab his go-bag from their car.

"Kensi? Kensi, we've got to get you cleaned up, okay?" Callen didn't get a response so he slowly lifted Kensi to a sitting position.

"Kens, did you hear me? Sam and I are going to help you clean up. Put you in fresh clothes." She slowly nodded in compliance more than understanding. Helping her to a stand, Callen felt how weak her body truly was. Trembling and unable to keep her knees steady he traded her to the returning Sam for the bag. Sam lifted her into his arms and carried her back inside, where the nurse tossed them an angry glare.

"Is there a bathroom we could use? We need to get her cleaned up," Sam asked politely.

The nurse merely pointed down the hallway.

Thankfully, the bathroom had a shower in place. Sam sat Kensi on the toilet as he began to run the tap.

Callen placed the bag on the floor and pulled out a towel. They needed to get her under the warm spray and fast.

"Kensi, you need to rinse off."

"Mmhhm," she finally emitted a response.

"Okay, Sam and I are going to leave the bag of clothes here for you to change into. If we don't hear from you in thirty minutes we are coming in to check. Dressed or not, okay?" Another nod was given in reply.

As the men left, Kensi slowly gathered the strength to peel off her jeans now caked with Deeks' blood and then her shirt. Stepping into the warm water still in bra and panties she slowly sunk to the floor letting the water turn red and swirl down the drain beside her. Kensi reached for the tap and turned the temperature up, scalding her weakened body and hoping to rinse away the pain of the morning. The morning that had begun so well with Deeks in her bed and then surfing the perfect waves, only to be shot and flatline in the ambulance. With those thoughts, another sob wracked her body as the water continued to cascade over her.

_I'm washing away what may be the only remnants of my partner, _she thought solemnly hearing the monotone beep replaying in her head. _I couldn't save him and he was shot because of the risk I told him to take. It's my fault._

A knock was heard at the door. Apparently her thirty minute time limit was up and Sam was back to check on her. She didn't have the strength to care that her teammates would see her so vulnerable. Badass Blye reduced to nothing but a shivering girl in the bottom of the shower.

The door cracked open revealing a worried set of eyes, not the blue or brown she had been expecting but a softer hazel.

"Hey Kensi," came Nell's sweet voice from the doorway, "I wanted to come see if you needed help."

Kensi was thankful to see Nell rather than Sam and Callen and let a small, somber smile pass over her features.

"Yeah. I think I need help Nell," her tears streaming down her face harder now.

"Awww it's going to be okay, Kensi," Nell falsely promised. She kneeled next to her soaking friend and pulled the woman into a hug, "It'll be okay," She whispered as she rocked Kensi and rubbed up and down her back. Kensi held onto Nell like her life depended on it.

After a few minutes Nell pulled back, "How about we wash your hair? It'll make you feel better." Kensi nodded as Nell passed her some shampoo from Sam's go-bag, silently wondering why the man had such an item, but thankful nonetheless. Rinsing her hair, Kensi felt some semblance to normal again. Next, Nell handed over the soap and Kensi scrubbed her body free of Deeks' blood repeatedly until her skin felt raw. The water finally ran clear as a towel was held out to her and Nell stepped outside again.

Kensi removed her water-soaked undergarments and pulled on very large sweatpants and t-shirt. Taking a glance in the mirror she couldn't help but let out a slightly hysterical laugh. She looked like a mess. Her face was splotchy and eyes inflamed. Her hair was tangled because of course Sam wouldn't carry a hairbrush in his bag, and the clothes were about nine sizes too big on her. Taking a deep breath, Kensi turned to exit the bathroom and face the news of her partner.

Her eyes roamed the waiting room until they fell on familiar faces. Her whole team—her family—was there. Sam and Callen sagged into their chairs with relief when they saw her in a slightly more functional state than the one in which they left her. Nell and Eric gave warm smiles, and Hetty nodded her head in respect toward her agent.

"I look ridiculous," were the first words out of her mouth. A strangled laugh came from the team as they fought for normality in a tense situation.

"Well, I for one thought ahead Miss Blye and brought your car to the hospital. You can go choose items from your own bag if you would like," stated an emotionless Hetty. Kensi nodded and head out to her car in search of a brush and better fitting clothes.

Reaching into her back seat she felt two bags sitting snuggly side by side. Deeks. Tears welled up in her eyes as she felt his go-bag next to hers. In that moment she ripped the zipper open in haste and pulled out the cozy sweatshirt she knew would be on top. It was always there.

_"Hey Kens. Grab my bag for me. Will ya?" shouted Deeks from his place in the locker room shower stall._

_"How did you even know I would be in here, Deeks? This is the men's locker room."_

_"Well, you're here so I could counter by asking what you are doing in the _men's _locker room," Deeks laughed._

_"Touche," Kensi shouted over the running water._

_"Hey you actually got that right, Fern." The water shut off and Deeks reached for his towel from the outside hook. Moments later he pulled back the curtain. Kensi gasped and quickly turned around, "DEEKS!"_

_"What, Kens? It's not like I'm naked! I have a towel on. I mean unless you want to change that?" he added suggestively._

_"No. I do not. Thank you very much."_

_"For some reason I have a hard time believing you." Deeks continued to laugh, "You know if you had just brought my bag over like I asked you wouldn't have found yourself gawking at a toned, towel clad greek God."_

_"Totally not gawking, Deeks," she rolled her eyes but the flush in her face stated otherwise. Deeks quickly unzipped his bag and reached for the item on top. A simple LAPD sweatshirt that had DEEKS written across the back._

_"Always on top. See, Kens this is what it's like to have organization in your life. I know without a doubt my sweatshirt will always be the first thing I see when I open this bag."_

_First thing you see when you open the bag_. Kensi quickly removed Sam's oversized t-shirt and pulled on Deeks' slightly better fitted sweatshirt. The smell of ocean and his shampoo engulfed and comforted Kensi. They hadn't heard a word from the doctors so that had to be a good sign right? If they couldn't revive her partner she would know by now.

Kensi continued to riffle through her partner's bag and found some smaller sweatpants that she pulled on. She felt so surrounded by Deeks that she just wanted to curl up and sleep, but the team was waiting for her. Kensi grabbed socks and a brush from her own bag and returned to the hospital waiting room.


	6. Chapter 6

Silence. No news. No smiles or tears. Just silence, and Kensi Blye thought she was going to go crazy from it.

The entire team had been waiting for news on Deeks for three long, restless hours. Nell had fallen asleep, her head on Eric's shoulder while he dozed in his chair. Sam had gone to the cafeteria to see about food, while Callen paced back and forth across the waiting room. Sitting quiet and astute as always was Hetty.

Kensi pulled her feet up onto the chair and hugged her knees like a small child, tucking her head into her chest. She would inhale deeply and the comfort of a smell that was distinctly Deeks calmed her racing pulse. She couldn't lose him, and the weight of the possibility had her feeling like Atlas. There was too much to say.

_Plus he promised her._ The agent scoffed at her own thoughts. _Of course he promised. He would do anything to please her. Anything. Including losing his upper hand with Crustoff so she could take a shot._

Kensi felt the blood drain from her already pale face. It was her fault. She allowed Deeks to get shot. If she hadn't asked him to let go of Crustoff he may have won the fight on his own.

She was going to be sick. Suddenly Kensi shot to her feet and ran back to the bathroom she had used earlier that morning. The agent heaved into the toilet as she fell to her already bruised knees.

A small part of her recognized that Deeks may have lost without her intervention as well, but her emotional side quickly pushed the rationale to the back of her mind as she continued to vomit bile.

A hand was placed gently on Kensi's back but she recoiled from the touch.

"Hey, Kensi. It'll be alright." The team leader's voice spoke gently in her ear as he squatted beside her. He had seen his teammate run off and with a nod from Hetty had followed.

"No, Callen. It's my fault. It's not okay." Kensi rested her warm face against the cool seat of the toilet thoroughly exhausted.

"Kens, don't say that. Crustoff is dead, and Deeks, well, we will find out more soon but he is tougher than you think."

"I told him to let go of Crustoff so I could get in a few shots. He had the upper hand, Callen. I made him lose that."

"You were trying to protect him. And you did. Crustoff was dead on impact. Deeks was injured."

"Yeah, but he died right in front of me. He flatlined in the ambulance." Big tears were making their way down the agents beautiful face as she glanced toward Callen. "He died and I just had to sit and watch. He was dead when they rolled him back to ICU." Kensi felt her stomach twist again at the thought and turned her head back to the toilet opening. Callen gently rubbed her back until she was finished, then handed her a moist paper towel.

"Come on, Kensi. Maybe some crackers and water will do you good. When was the last time you ate?"

"Deeks and I had some cereal this morning after Sam called." Kensi replied softly.

"Okay, well he should be back soon with breakfast. Do you want a nurse to check you out or are you going to be alright," Callen nervously took in his agent's trembling body and pale features covered in a sheen of sweat. Deeks' unknown status was really taking a toll on his partner.

"No. I'm fine." Deeks never would have let her response slide so easily but Callen merely stood up and grabbed Kensi under the arms to haul her to her feet. She could barely keep her knees from buckling as lack of sleep, food, and stress took its toll on her exhausted frame.

As the pair entered the waiting room, they saw the whole team huddled around a petite nurse. Kensi let go of Callen and rushed over to the group, heart pounding in anticipation.

"How is he?" Kensi interrupted.

The nurse glanced over to the young woman and decided to ignore her, continuing with her report, "As I was saying, Mr. Deeks underwent extensive surgery on both the chest wound and his thigh. The two bullets had to be removed, and some of the damage repaired. The bullet to his chest grazed his left lung causing a collapse, as well as, shattering his collarbone. The bullet narrowly missed his heart but the bone deflected the round.

"As for the damage to his leg, Mr. Deeks was very lucky we could repair the damage in time. The bullet burst a major artery which caused him to lose blood flow to the lower leg. If pressure had not been applied at the scene, he very well may have lost his leg along with his life. Said artery was stitched but is being watched with extreme caution. The bullet lodged itself in the femur which will cause extreme pain during the recovery process, seeing as the bone was severely damaged as well."

Kensi felt a little weight lift off her sagging shoulders at the nurse's words. She had saved Deeks' leg. If she had ignored the injured thigh and focused solely on the chest wound his injuries would have been worse and he would very possibly have died on site.

"Mr. Deeks is in a medically induced coma for the time being in hopes that his body will begin the repair process. He has also been placed on a ventilator due to his injured lung. Although surgery has helped the patient's situation, he is not out of the clear. We lost him twice on the table in addition to the time in the ambulance. The third time it was a struggle to regain stability. Mr. Deeks will be heavily watched for the next 48 hours and will remain in critical condition until otherwise noted."

With that the nurse paused, waiting for the bombardment of questions from the group.

"So he will live?" Kensi asked hopefully.

"The odds are still not great, but better than they were a few hours ago," The nurse stated mechanically.

Kensi felt her heart drop at her words. _Not great._ That wasn't good enough for Kensi and she let the nurse know, "Well, isn't there anything else you can do?" Kensi's voice was slowly rising to a yell.

"I mean you have an officer of the law lying in there and you can't help him any more than you have?"

"Miss Blye," Hetty chastised. "These hard working professionals know what they are doing. At some point you just have to hope Mr. Deeks has the strength to pull through on his own."

Kensi sent a quick glare in the operations manager's direction, but soon felt ashamed. Looking to the nurse she apologized for her behavior, "I am sorry. He is my partner and I failed him. This isn't your fault, it's mine."

With watery eyes, the agent turned and sagged into the nearest chair covering her face with tired hands. The rest of the group thanked the nurse for the information and went to Kensi.

"Miss Blye, a word."

"Hetty, I—"

"No, Miss Blye. Now."

As Hetty guided Kensi out of the waiting room, the bright sunlight of the day hit their faces. Kensi could see the road past the hospital parking lot. People continued their mornings as if nothing had changed and yet for Kensi everything had shifted. The early morning, waking up with Deeks felt so far away at the moment and yet it had only been a little over six hours before.

"Kensi," The agent's head shot up hearing her first name being used from the tiny woman in front of her. "Mr. Deeks will pull through. You must have faith in his strength. But what is all of this nonsense about it being your fault?"

"It is Hetty. He let go of Crustoff's weapon so I could get in a shot."

"Well, the way I look at it you saved his life. The nurse mentioned that Mr. Deeks would have lost his leg if pressure wasn't applied on site. Obviously you did something right. Even though Mr. Deeks is in critical condition, it could have been much worse. He may not have even been given the chance to fight had it not been for your strength."

Kensi absorbed Hetty's words for a moment before replying, "Doesn't feel that way, Hetty. It feels like I put him in that hospital bed on a ventilator."

"I assure you, Miss Blye that is not the case. Now would you like to visit Mr. Deeks?"

Kensi gave a sad nod and followed Hetty back inside.

Kensi crept down the hallway fearing what she may see as she entered her partner's room. Keeping in mind that he was on a vent, she slowly opened the door. Although she had tried to mentally prepare herself for the image in front of her, she still vastly underestimated the extent of Deeks' injuries.

Deeks had so many monitors and machines surrounding him she could hardly squeeze into the small room. The _whoosh_ of the ventilator put Kensi on edge, knowing that without it her partner may suffocate. She followed the tube exiting the machine to Deeks' very still, very chapped lips.

An IV was giving his body the nutrients and medications it needed for the time being and a heart rate monitor was marking the precious counts of his beating heart.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. _

Steady and strong. Kensi felt as though she could weep at the beautiful rhythm that she had lost in the ambulance.

Deeks was alive. That was all that Kensi cared about in that moment. As she approached the bed, the agent noticed the immense bandaging holding her partner's shoulder and ribcage in position. His chest was bare and the white gauze and padding wrapped around his shoulder and torso, disappearing beneath the blankets around his waist.

Deeks' legs were covered for which Kensi was thankful. She could hardly handle the view of his chest in such severe condition and could only imagine his leg to be worse. The nurse had mentioned severe bruising to the area due to internal bleeding when the artery burst. His leg would be black and blue for a few weeks.

Kensi sunk into the only available chair in the room and started praying—something she hadn't done in a very long time.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Hey guys! Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews. This is my first fic so its exciting to see some interest in my story. Since I'm new to publishing I hadn't quite figured out how to make page breakers (mine kept disappearing somehow) so I have now gone back and added them in previous chapters. As always let me know what you think!**

* * *

An indeterminable amount of time had passed when Kensi heard a soft knock at the door. The agent lifted her head from her hands, wiping at the tears she hadn't realized were falling.

"Yes?"

A young nurse with mousy-brown hair entered with a smile small, "I'm Jenna. Just here to check on Mr. Deeks. Would you like to step out?"

Kensi stood and gave the nurse a hard look, "I would rather stay."

At the woman's firm tone, Jenna dropped the matter and moved over to Deeks' bedside.

"I have to change his wrappings, so be prepared. It's not a pretty sight." Kensi nodded at the nurse's words but held her ground. Ever so gently Jenna began to remove the white cloths covering Deeks' torso and shoulder. Kensi held back a gasp but couldn't suppress the visible shudder that ran through her body as her partner's batter body was revealed to her.

The yellow heads of pins were sticking out from his collarbone, holding the broken bone in place, while bruising and stitches also surrounded the area. Kensi's eyes trailed lower seeing a large surgical cut that had been used to repair his damaged lung. The nurse filled a basin with warm water and began to clean the wounds.

Jenna had taken to the young detective and gently began to speak with the comatose man, "You should feel much better after this, Mr. Deeks. We will get you in tip-top shape in no time." She ran a hand over his forehead, sweeping some of his unkempt hair aside.

Kensi felt her face flush with anger. _What does she think she is doing? She is just here to change his wrappings._

The agent quickly stepped up to her partner's bed and cleared her throat catching Jenna's attention, "So when will he wake up?"

"We are hoping to wean him off the anesthesia within the next few hours. It may take up to six hours after that for him to find the strength to regain consciousness. He seems to be taking well to the surgery and we want to get him breathing on his own again as soon as possible so his diaphragm doesn't weaken. No sign of infections, at least near his clavicle so that is also a good sign. He does have a slight fever, but we are working on lowering it. Although Mr. Deeks is not out of the ballpark yet, the doctors have high hopes."

"Is there anything I should do?"

"Be there for him like you have been. Don't be afraid to touch him or speak with him. Sometimes talking speeds up the awakening process once the drugs are reduced." Kensi nodded but still felt helpless.

Jenna had re-bandaged Deeks' chest and was moving the blanket that covered his right leg. A brace had been placed on his leg to keep it stabilized so as to not further injure the femur. Kensi watched in silence as the bracing was removed along with heavy bandaging. A long line of stitches trailed down Deeks' inner thigh leaving an angry red mark. But that is not what caught Kensi's attention. Her partner's leg was severely discolored. There was not a hint of the beautiful golden skin tanned by days spent at the beach anywhere in sight. Black, blue, and green spotted Deeks' thigh like ugly splatter paint. The bruising continued down his leg where it slowly turned to a strange grey coloring below the knee.

"Why is his leg that color?" Kensi asked in shock.

"Mr. Deeks lost quite a bit of blood flow to his lower leg. It will take a few days for the blood to spread back and revitalize damaged tissue. You should be aware that the bruising will only get worse in the next few days as his system fights off the internal bleeding from the artery we had to repair."

Kensi sat heavily in the chair, her legs no longer able to keep her upright. Her partner had a long road to recovery even after he survived the next 48 hours. Because he _would_ survive_._ He had promised her.

"Are you okay?" The nurse had seen the blood drain from the woman's face as she took a seat.

"I'm fine." A simple, yet meaningless answer, but one that had Jenna nodding and returning her attention to Deeks. The reality of Deeks' situation once again crashed onto Kensi, but she knew she had to be strong, if not for herself then for her partner lying, hurt in the bed before her.

"All done," Jenna said with a smile as she replaced the blanket over Deeks' leg. With a glance over at Kensi, the nurse leaned in close to Deeks' ear, "She really cares for you and needs you to pull through. Okay? Don't let her down." Once again, Jenna pressed back hair from the man's moist forehead and turned to the door.

"Remember what I said about talking to and touching him. Every bit of stimulation helps."

Kensi nodded but felt unsure about having a one-sided conversation with her usually boisterous partner. Despite the anger, or was it jealousy, that she had felt toward the nurse as she caressed those beautiful golden locks, Kensi felt as though touching Deeks' in such a way would bring forth emotions she would rather keep suppressed. Emotions that longed for a chance to become exposed but she feared were not reciprocated.

Nonetheless, the agent silently scooted her chair forward and tentatively reached for Deeks' cold, pale hand.

"Hey there, partner. I—We need you to fight this okay? They are going to lower the drugs in your system and you're going to wake up," Kensi silently added _so I can see those beautiful blue eyes again_. "The team. They are all waiting for you out there. Just make it through the next couple of days. It'll be hard but I know you are strong enough. Come on, Deeks. This is your chance to prove yourself to Sam and all the others who ever called you weak."

Kensi gently laid her head on her hand that was covering Deeks. _I need you. Please don't leave me like all the others have._

Damnit! Why did Deeks have the capability of worming his way through her well-built defenses? She was Kensi Marie Blye. She didn't need anyone—except apparently her partner, her best friend whose life was dangling from a very thin thread.

With those final thought, Kensi's exhaustion finally took over her body and she fell asleep resting against the side of her partner's bed.

* * *

A loud beeping startled the sleeping agent awake. Glancing at her watch she realized it was now late into the evening.

Without warning, Kensi was swallowed by chaos. Nurses and doctors rushed the room like seals in combat.

"His heart rate and temperature are rising," shouted a nurse.

"He is fighting the tube. We need to get it out."

"It's too soon. He shouldn't be waking yet."

The phrases all jumbled in Kensi's head as a doctor shoved her out of the room and shut the door behind him.

The agent watched through the window as her partner's bed was swarmed, surrounding him so completely she couldn't catch a glimpse of him.

It was all too much. He couldn't do this to her again. Kensi slid down the wall and began to sob. Deeks was the single most important person in her life and he was leaving her. The nurse had said things were looking up, what had changed in a few hours?

Slowly the medical staff began to exit Deeks' room. Kensi stood and grabbed a doctor by the arm, "Is he alive?"

"I cannot disclose any patient information," the doctor stated. Kensi's face turned red with fury.

"Agent Kensi Blye, NCIS. That is my partner you have in there. I _will_ be told his status immediately." The agent flashed her badge.

Whether out of fear or civic duty the doctor finally replied, "Yes, Mr. Deeks is alive. We managed to stabilize him before he coded. His temperature has risen, and it appears he is fighting an infection in his damaged lung. We were however able to remove the ventilator for the time being. The patient was fighting it and although it is sooner than we would have liked it was in his best interest to remove it before it caused more damage to the stitching within his lung."

"So he should be okay, right?" Kensi asked hopefully.

"As long as his body can fight this infection, Mr. Deeks seems to be making good progress, although won't be in the clear for another day or so. Many things can go wrong with as extensive surgery as he experienced. The additional trauma was a shock to his already weak system." With those final words the doctor turned to alert Hetty, Deeks' next of kin, of his patient's status, as Kensi made her way back into the hospital room.

Deeks was covered in sweat and had cooling pads covering his body. The fever was causing trembling to wrack his weakened figure. Kensi had never seen her partner look so fragile before, but lying in the hospital bed, he looked like a small child. Her eyes drifted to his face which was flushed and held a look of discomfort but was pleased to see a small nasal cannula versus the large tubing from the ventilator.

As if instinctively, Kensi swiped a hand over Deeks' brow. He was extremely warm to the touch. His hair stuck in wet tendrils across his face, but still surprisingly soft as they slid through Kensi's fingers.

"You scared me. Don't you dare do that again unless you want me to punch you in the bullet hole." A small smile graced her lips as she repeated the words from her partner's previous time in the hospital. She hoped humor would help ease the tension she was feeling. All she wished for was the usual, irritating banter Kensi always expected from her partner. Instead, the room was filled with silence.

Kensi sighed and resigned herself to the hard, plastic chair which was taking its toll on her body. She heard the door creak open behind her.

"Miss Blye, I feel it is time you took a break. I will be here to watch over Mr. Deeks. You are to go home and rest. Shower and eat something while you are at it. We do not need you lying in a hospital bed with an IV in your arm as well."

"But Hetty…"

"No buts, Miss Blye. You are to do as I say. If there is any update on your partner's condition I will be sure to let you know. I do not want to see you here until the morning. Good night, Kensi."

The operations manager left no room for debate and Kensi exited the room after leaning into Deeks, "I'll be back as soon as I can. Promise. Don't do anything stupid like die while I'm gone."

The team watched as Kensi sulked into the waiting room.

"I've been forced to go home," she explained half-heartedly, "Hetty's orders." The team nodded. Sam offered to drive Kensi home in her car and then catch a cab.

As the OSP team silently went their separate ways for the evening, they each promised to return in the morning to check on Deeks'. Kensi was reluctant to leave but knew her partner was in good hands with the ever-vigilant Henrietta Lange. She would make sure her agents were up to date on any changes Deeks' experienced.

The ride home was quiet, but Sam graciously didn't force any information from Kensi, understanding what it felt like to have a partner battling for his life. When G had been shot, Sam had felt like he was losing a limb. He figured for Kensi it must be worse considering her complicated relationship with Deeks.

"Kens, if you wanna talk, I'm here. I know this is harder for you than the rest of us, because of, you know, Deeks and your 'thing'."

Kensi glanced at Sam with a bewildered expression. _Was it really that obvious?_

Sam continued, "I mean don't get me wrong, even though he annoys the shit out of me, Deeks is part of this team. We would function much differently without him. Hell, you would function much differently without him. I've seen him bring out the best in you, Kensi. He is the only one that can genuinely make you laugh and smile. It's nice to see you happy. When he pulls through this, don't let that slip away from you."

_Did Sam just encourage me to get involved with Deeks?_ Kensi sat incredulously and kept he eyes focused out the window, unsure of how to respond to Sam's little spiel.

The rest of the ride was silent, and soon Sam was pulling up to Kensi's driveway. He walked her up to the front door as she fumbled with her keys. It was going to be a long night, but Kensi expected her emotionally drained body to be consumed by sleep the moment hit the bed, no matter how hard she worked to stay awake.

Sam rode away in the cab and Kensi locked her door behind her. Slowly she stripped off Deeks' sweats and grabbed a granola bar from her empty pantry. A warm bath would do her good, so as the tub filled she nibbled on her small dinner. It was then that she realized how hungry she truly was. Any food she had consumed that morning was lost in the toilet and she hadn't eaten anything after that. Breakfast brought by Sam had been interrupted by the initial news on Deeks' condition.

As she sunk into the warm water of the bath, Kensi called Deeks' favorite take-out, to be delivered to her house. After placing the order, the agent closed her eyes and tried to relax as warmth surrounded her.

The ringing of the doorbell jolted Kensi out of her headspace and she quickly threw on a robe. She paid the delivery guy who was blatantly eying her barely clad form in appreciation. Kensi hardly noticed as she shut the door and collapsed to her couch, happy to be eating something substantial. Finishing her dinner, she placed the empty containers on her cluttered coffee-table. One that had Deeks going crazy every time he visited.

_"You know it wouldn't be too hard to clean up every once in a while, Princess."_

_"And it wouldn't be too hard for you to deal with the mess every once in a while, Partner."_

_Deeks had just rolled his eyes and began to tidy the room by impulse._

At the memory Kensi decided to get up and throw out her container, as well as clean up a bit. She could hear Deeks saying, "Wow. Kensi Blye cleaning. What alternate universe am I in?"

Kensi laughed at her imaginary Deeks, knowing he would be proud of her work. Sitting back down on the couch she curled her feet into a cushion and covered herself with the afghan. She put old reruns of America's Next Top Model on and fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys! Sorry for the delay but school just started and I'm trying to get organized for this semester. I've gotten fantastic reviews that I thank you all very much for! Definitely having fun writing this piece. Let me know what you think!**

* * *

Kensi was rudely awakened from deep sleep by the alarm she had set on her phone. She slowly sat up, stretching her tight body. Maybe falling asleep on the couch hadn't been one of her best ideas, but she did find herself a lot more emotionally stable and ready to face whatever Deeks' nurses would throw at her (so she thought).

The agent quickly arrived at the hospital.

"Good morning, Miss Blye." Hetty had kept vigil over her partner all night as promised.

"Morning, Hetty. I'm assuming no changes, considering I didn't receive a call?"

"Only good changes. It appears your partner has been effectively fighting off the infection in his chest and will be awake within the hour. His body temperature is slowly returning to normal and the doctors have high hopes for recovery."

Kensi brightened at the news. Her Deeks would make it. He was a fighter and although he still could come across serious complications in the next 18 hours, things were looking up for the first time since early the morning before.

"Keep in mind, Miss Blye, Mr. Deeks is still considered critical, but if anyone can press through it is our Detective." Hetty wanted to make it clear that the struggle was not over.

Kensi nodded in agreement, but couldn't shake the small hope rising in her chest. She slid up to her partner's bedside and once again swiped her hand over the golden locks that covered his eyes.

"Time for a haircut there, partner," Kensi whispered.

The fever had definitely dipped as a soothing warmth spread to her hand from Deeks' forehead, which was no longer clammy. She noted that a bit of color had returned to his face overnight and that his expression seemed more relaxed.

Hetty decided to leave Deeks in Kensi's care for a moment and stepped out to inform the team of Deeks' encouraging condition.

Kensi took a seat and pulled the chair to the bedside.

"Deeks, you have to wake up, okay? You gave us all a scare. We need you…I need you," she quietly admitted to his unconscious form. Tentatively cupping his hand in both of hers, she brought it to her mouth planting a small kiss on his fingertips. The agent then rested her forehead on their intertwined hands.

* * *

A small noise caused Kensi to lift her head. At first she thought it was imagined, but then she heard it again. A low groan. And then a series of rapid eye movement from her sleeping partner.

"Finally," she jokingly chastised.

Tightening her grip on his hand, Kensi reached out with her other to stroke the Detective's hair.

"Come on, Deeks. Haven't you had enough sleep? Wake up." Kensi hoped that returning to their usual banter would allow Deeks to feel more comfortable and not alarm him as he woke.

Nurse Jenna soon came to the door, having been notified by the increased heart rate that her patient was waking.

"That's good. Keep talking to him. A familiar voice should help keep him calm as he comes to. Mr. Deeks will most likely experience disorientation and immense pain, as we had to lower the morphine to force his body to regain consciousness."

Kensi did as she was told, "Hey, Deeks. Come on. Open your eyes. I know of someone who has missed you…Monty." The brunette let out a small laugh at her own joke, "Yup. Monty definitely misses his daddy, Deeks."

The heart monitor began to pick up pace at a furious rate and Deeks' once smooth features scrunched into a grimace.

"Should it be doing that?" asked Kensi in alarm.

"He is still at safe levels, so long as he can force himself awake in the next minute or so."

Kensi tried a different tactic, "Detective Deeks, you will open your eyes—NOW!"

At that, Deeks' eyes shot open and he gasped for air. He was always one for following orders, never wanting to disappoint.

Kensi let go of her partner's hand only to grab his face gently, "Deeks. Deeks, listen to me. You are okay. You're okay. Calm down." Recognition soon lit his eyes as they met her beautiful multi-colored orbs and relief washed through the achy Detective.

"God, everything hurts, Kens. What the hell did you do to me?" Deeks tried to smile but the pain was too much and he collapsed back against the bed clutching his chest, trying to suppress a moan.

"I didn't do anything. You had to go get yourself shot by Crustoff," although Kensi was impressed by her hard tone, her face dropped at her partner's words. She was still blaming herself for his condition.

"Shot, huh? It didn't feel this bad the last time, Princess." The detective's breaths were slightly laborious as pain took over his body. Kensi rolled her eyes, even seriously injured he was the same ole Deeks.

"Mr. Deeks, I would like to take your vitals now," the nurse who had long been forgotten finally spoke up.

Deeks turned his head to see the mousy woman who was trying to get to his bedside.

"Sure," Deeks added a cheeky grin that didn't reach his pain filled eyes. Once he was cleared by Jenna, she left the room to the partners.

"So what happened that I feel as though I've died and come back as the living dead, Kens?" Kensi felt the blood drain from her face. Nausea suddenly taking over, she bolted to the attached bathroom. Deeks' brain was still groggy from the medication, but found the reaction to his simple question a tad odd for his usually oh so put together partner.

A few minutes passed until Kensi returned still looking flushed and refusing to meet the cerulean eyes she had missed so much in the past 30 hours.

"Sorry, um," Kensi cleared her throat, "Well, Crustoff got a couple shots off at you when you released his weapon. I took him down fast but—not fast enough I guess."

"Kens…"

"He got you in the chest and thigh. Bullet broke your collarbone, which thankfully deflected away from your heart, but unfortunately collapsed a lung."

"Explains why breathing is a bitch right now."

"He hit your artery in your inner thigh and you lost a lot of blood." Kensi had carried on mechanically, as though repeating information on an impersonal case to the man lying in front of her.

"I'm sensing that's not it considering how you ran from the room just now, Kensi."

Brown eyes glanced up sadly at his, shocking Deeks when a wet sheen of tears covered their beautiful discoloration.

"You died."

"I did what?" The answer caused the detective to sit up straight in bed, which he soon discovered was a very bad move. He grasped onto his shoulder feeling a hot pain shoot through his collarbone. Shocked by the insurgence of pain, he too quickly tried to inhale deeply causing his body to react with violent coughing.

"Deeks! Please calm down. I need you to calm down." Seeing her partner's wracking form caused the tears she had been holding at bay to stream down her pink cheeks. "Please. Please." She begged but Deeks' body wasn't responding. He couldn't stop the cough.

Kensi reached over for the call button and Jenna immediately appeared in the door.

"What happened?!" Jenna turned on Kensi as she approached Deeks.

"He was surprised then sat up too quickly. I—I don't know what to do." Kensi's tears were upsetting Deeks more and worsening the situation. Suddenly red was staining Deeks' lips. Blood.

Try as he might, he couldn't get his body to calm itself, the sight of the blood sending the Detective into a panic. His coughing had turned to gasps as he struggled for air.

"Mr. Deeks, I need you to sit forward. I know it hurts but we need to clear your passageways." Jenna pulled Deeks forward and wiped his mouth of the blood.

Kensi screamed at the nurse, "What is happening to him?"

"Ma'am, I need you to stay calm," pushing Kensi toward the door.

"Stay calm? My partner is coughing up blood!"

Jenna ignored the woman and continued to treat her patient. "Mr. Deeks, I need to try and remove the blood from your lungs. In order for this to happen I need to place a suction tube down your trachea."

Deeks eyes lit up with fear and his already raspy breaths, began to completely clog, inhibiting the oxygen he craved so much.

"On three," Jenna said, leaving Deeks no choice, "I need you to try and exhale, okay? One, two, three."

Deeks did as he was told and exhaled what precious, little oxygen was in his lungs as the nurse forced a small suction tube down his blocked air passage. Red immediately filled the device. Jenna removed the tube in order to allow the Detective to breathe.

"I am going to put this oxygen mask on you, okay." Jenna helped lower her patient back to the bed and firmly placed the mask over his face.

"Breathe with my counts. One. Two. One. Two." The nurse created a slow, calming cadence. After several minutes Deeks' was able to breathe more easily.

"Very good." Jenna commented soothingly, wiping the remnants of blood from his face. "Lie still and no more coughing," she commanded. "Now that you are awake, I am going to deliver pain medication to let you rest more at ease, Detective." Deeks gave a small nod feeling a burning sensation in his injured lung.

Jenna left the room, only to be followed.

"You want to tell me what the hell just happened," an angry, but crying Kensi approached the small nurse.

"He coughed too hard and ripped the stitching in his lung. I will keep an eye on it but he shouldn't start bleeding again unless another fit occurs."

"And what about the damaged stitching?"

"A doctor will need to do a partial endoscopy to ensure no repairs need to be done. We will have to place him under mild anesthesia to ensure he doesn't wake during the short procedure. But I do not foresee a need for surgery. The amount of blood was minute compared to some cases, not enough to cause extensive damage. He will probably experience several fits like this one, but the key is to keep him calm so I can do my job."

Kensi noted the nurse's tone and looked at her apologetically, "It just scared me. I can't lose him."

At the defeat in the other woman's voice, Jenna softened, "Okay. Just next time help me, don't hinder me." With a small smile she turned and walked towards the sinks to wash her hands.

Kensi returned to the hospital room, where Deeks lay slightly trembling, face still covered by the oxygen mask.

"Hey, it'll be okay," Kensi ran a soothing hand over his hair. Surprised at the gesture Deeks stilled, but then sunk into the comforting strokes. His mom used to do that when he was sick as a kid.

"It's all okay, Deeks. Just ripped a few stitches. No biggie. The nurse said it may happen a few more times during recovery, but that it's just part of the healing process, okay?"

Deeks nodded slightly, but couldn't stop the scared trembling.

"Deeks, I promise you will be alright. The doctor is going to come in and give you a tiny anesthesia and check your lungs while you rest, okay?"

The detective could already feel himself slipping into sleep between the exhaustion from his coughing and the soothing hand his partner kept running through his hair.

Kensi continued to speak softly to Deeks, reassuring him that he was going to be fine and promising she would be there the whole time.

With those comforting thoughts, Deeks' body once again slipped into unconsciousness, not twenty minutes after he initially woke.


	9. Chapter 9

"How is he?" Kensi was startled to hear her team leader's voice behind her. Realizing she was still stroking her partner's hair, her hand immediately withdrew.

"Tired. After he woke up, he had a coughing fit and ripped internal stiches. The doctor checked and said he'd be okay. That it didn't harm anything." Kensi glanced at Callen standing in the doorway.

"Yeah. Hetty told us." Callen was at a loss for words. As he examined Kensi he noticed her exhausted features and tear stained cheeks. Although Deeks was the one lying in the bed, his partner was taking the brunt of the emotional load from this case.

"Is Sarah okay?" Kensi suddenly remembered the pregnant woman that had been kidnapped.

"Yeah. She's doing fine. Experienced a bit of shock but held her own. The case is officially closed."

Kensi nodded and felt some of the weight lift from her shoulders.

"Don't worry about paperwork, Kens. Sam and I have got it covered. I just wanted to stop by and see how it was going. He should be cleared of critical condition in a few hours, right?" Callen gestured towards Deeks.

"Mhmm. At least I won't have to be on full alert then," Kensi tried to add a smile but failed. It was hitting her hard that she almost lost Deeks—multiple times.

"He's going to make it, Kens," Callen encouraged knowing the trauma his agent had experienced. "Deeks, he's a fighter. Always trying to prove something to the world."

Kensi smiled at that. At least Callen held high regards towards their newest team member.

"Why don't you go home?"

"I was there this morning. I'm fine. Plus somebody needs to be here for Deeks when he wakes up. Last time he panicked."

"Kens.."

"Callen, I'm staying." Kensi's voice held no waver.

Callen held up his hands defensively, "Okay. Okay. Just let me know if you need something."

"Coffee." The older agent laughed and nodded, leaving the room in search of coffee for Kensi.

As if on cue, Kensi's phone rang, indicating a call from Nell.

"Hey. What's up?"

"How's Deeks?" Nell asked without pause.

"Better, I guess. Asleep again but they should move him from ICU within a few hours."

"That's great! Maybe I will come visit. Anything you need me to bring? Does he need clothes or food?" Nell quickly rambled off questions into the phone.

"I'm not sure if he is allowed to wear his own stuff but go ahead and bring some sweats and some sort of button down so he doesn't lift his arms."

"You got it! I'll see you guys after work." With that the intelligence analyst hung up.

"I see Nell finally got ahold of you," Callen laughed, holding out a coffee and a sandwich.

"Yeah. She wants to come by. Hopefully Deeks will be awake then," Kensi's eyes were suddenly filled with sadness, "He was in so much pain, Callen. He tried to pretend but I could see it in his eyes and features. But at the same time, you know how much Deeks hates the effect of those drugs they pump into him."

"Yeah, maybe they can give him a lower dose?" The team leader suggested.

"I was going to ask as soon as the nurse comes in again."

Silence settled over the two for a few minutes.

"Have you seen the wounds?" Callen let his eyes curiously roam to the detective's shoulder, still bandaged in white gauze.

"Yeah. They are pretty bad. He's got yellow pins sticking out of his collarbone and stitching surrounding it. His leg is the worst though. Yesterday his thigh was swollen and black and blue, but below the knee an ugly grey-ish color. They said it was lack of blood flow. Hopefully today his lower leg will be better. Unfortunately the bruising up top will only get worse. He has stiches all along his interior thigh where the arterial repair happened. It's definitely going to leave a scar." _A reminder to me that I almost lost him._

"Better than being dead, Kens," Callen saw the quick flash of hurt in her eyes. "You saved him, Kensi. You need to believe that. If you hadn't been there Deeks would be lying in a morgue."

"No. Without the doctor's he would by lying in a morgue." Kensi fought back angrily.

"It was you that kept him alive until the ambulance got there. Nobody else could have done that."

Kensi couldn't respond. Her heart felt so heavy with the weight of blame, but Callen's words made sense.

"But if…"

"No buts, Kensi. You made a call. Probably the best one at that. Yes, Deeks got caught in the crossfires, but you saved his life. Be proud of that and let it go. Deeks is alive now and he is going to need you," Callen's tone had turned firm. Kensi needed to get it through that thick skull of hers that Deeks' situation was only better because of her presence, not worse.

"Fine," the brunette huffed, refusing to turn her multi-colored eyes toward her leader.

"Fine."

Callen laughed and told Kensi to call if she needed anything. Sam would be over after dinner to check-in. With that information delivered, the agent left the room knowing Deeks was in the best hands.

* * *

"Kensi?" A low grumble came from the bed in front of her.

"Yeah, Deeks. I'm here. You're alright." Kensi squeezed the hand she had been holding and leaned over the bed to take in Deeks' face.

A small smile stretched itself across his full lips, "Hello, Sunshine." Kensi let out a booming laugh, glad that her partner could still brighten the mood, despite his situation.

"Glad I still got it," Deeks coughed.

"Got what, partner?" Kensi played along, however worried about the coughing.

"My charm."

"Ha. If you say so."

"I think the smile on your face says it all, Fern." Kensi just laughed some more and pushed a Jell-o cup toward her partner.

"The nurse brought it for you to have when you woke up. I debated eating it but figured maybe you deserved this one."

"Awww, is Bad-Ass Blye going soft for me?"

"Maybe I just pity you," she responded with a smirk.

"Pity?! It's impossible to pity me with this amazing bod and sexy hair." Kensi just rolled her eyes, refusing to deny his statement. It would be a lie anyways, and she knew it.

"How're you feeling, Deeks?"

"I hurt like hell, but I think I'll recover," he added a small smile as proof. The pain was overwhelming but he preferred consciousness and talking to his partner. The drugs made him disappear, and he hated the blackness. Every time waking up was a struggle. Every time it was Kensi who pulled him out.

"Good. I need to have someone to pick on at work and to buy my ice cream on movie nights."

"I'm hurt. Is that all I am to you?" Deeks feigned devastation, gently placing a hand on his injured chest.

"You know it," Kensi laughed. It felt good, no, it felt great, to get back to their usual banter. "Nell is coming over later to bring you some real clothes. Hopefully the nurses will allow it."

"Yeah, it's getting a bit breezy," the detective laughed and pulled on his gown.

"Oh and Sam said he is coming to check in too."

"Okay. I just hope I can stay up that long. I hate these drugs they have me on, Kens. They make me all groggy."

"I know. I asked Jenna last time she came in if she would lower them. She said she had to have your verbal permission, so you are going to have to deal with her yourself. Sorry, partner."

"S'okay. I have my ways," some of the mischievous twinkle returned to his eyes and Kensi resisted punching his shoulder, considering his injured state.

"Also, you should be cleared of ICU as soon as the doctor finds out you are back from the land of nod and checks you out."

"Awesome." Deeks sighed and relaxed a bit further into his pillow. He hurt like nothing else, but at least the pain meant he was alive. He would heal.

* * *

"Alright, Mr. Deeks, you are looking really good considering. I think it's time we move you to a different room."

"When am I not looking good?" Deeks muttered to Kensi who covered her laugh with her hand, but rolled her eyes at her partner's antics.

Deeks shuffled to sit up, slowly. Kensi placed a hand on his back to help him when she heard a gasp of pain.

"Nope. I'm good. I got this."

"Got what exactly, Deeks?"

"I'm getting myself up to my new room."

"Dummy, they move your whole bed. Plus, have you seen your leg? No weight is going on that for a while," Kensi pushed her partner back down. He let out a groan of frustration, feeling totally helpless.

"I hate this."

"I know."

Once Deeks was settled in his new room, Kensi let out a sigh of relief.

"What was the sigh for, Kens?" Deeks questioned.

"Nothing. Just relieved for you to be in here and not downstairs." Kensi spent way too long fretting over whether or not her partner would make it through this ordeal. Now they had gotten the news that he should make a full recovery. It would be a long struggle but they had confidence he would be able to do field work again, should he choose.

"Yeah, tell me about it. I wasn't even allowed to pee like a human being up there." Deeks infused a bit of humor into the situation trying to avoid the very serious conversation he felt mounting. Apparently, his partner didn't get the hint.

"Deeks. I'm sorry," the agent mumbled to the wall.

"For what? Saving my life?" The detective asked incredulously, once again pushing himself to sit upright.

"No, of course not! For putting you in the situation to begin with." Kensi turned to face her partner. "And you should really be lying down, Deeks," she chastised. Moving toward the bed, she grabbed the remote and raised the mattress to the same angle in which Deeks sat, "Better?"

He nodded and continued, "You made the right call, Kens. The same call any of us would have made. Plus, if I hadn't agreed with it, do you think I would have moved so you could take the shot?"

Kensi slowly shook her head.

"Fern, you got me out of there alive. I owe you everything."

"Yeah, but I let you die," tears once again sprang to her eyes.

"You had no control over it. Shoot, actually I'm surprised you haven't hit me yet for dying, let alone trying to place the blame on yourself. That's just crazy, Kens," Deeks shook his head in disbelief and his tone held a bit of anger toward his partner. She should never believe that this was her fault. Ever.

"I can't hit your shoulder and that's my go to spot. Expect a few punches after you recover." Deeks smiled at her words, knowing the tension from their previous conversation was dissipating.

"I'll even give you a few free ones, Baby girl."

Kensi's eyebrows shot up, "What did I tell you about calling me that, Deeks," she warned.

"If I recall, it was that I would wind up in ICU, but considering recent turn of events, I figured you would leave me at peace in a standard room," he laughed.

"For now," Kensi warned.

"Why do I not believe you, Princess?"

"God, Deeks! Stop with the nicknames. Just 'cause I can't hurt you now doesn't mean I won't later."

"Awww, I see you two are getting back to normal."

The pair turned toward the door to see Nell and Sam holding back snickers in the doorframe.

"Hey, guys!" Deeks greeted, glad he was still awake.

"Hey, Deeks."

"What's up, man?" Sam added gruffly.

"I brought you some clothes. Figured you would want something more comfortable the next few days while you're stuck in here." Nell held out her offering to Kensi, who set them on the side table.

"And I brought some food," Sam smiled holding up a bad of Chinese.

"Yes! Real food!" Deeks fist-pumped the air, or attempted to, before he let out a screech and crumpled forward in pain, holding his shoulder.

"Shit. That was stupid," Deeks cursed, as Kensi simultaneously rushed, "Oh my god! Are you okay? Do you need a nurse?"

She was at his bedside rubbing his back as he hunched over within seconds. Nell and Sam shared a glance. The dynamic between the two partners seemed a tad more intimate than usual.

_About time,_ Nell internalized. Sam just shook his head, but had no place to chastise colleagues "becoming more" considering he married his first partner.

"Nope. I'm good." Deeks' breathing was labored from pain and leaning forward into his damaged lung. His eyes were screwed shut in pain, but as Kensi slowly lowered him back to the bed, he began to relax his body.

"Don't do that," Kensi reprimanded.

"Thanks, Kens. I'll keep that in mind next time," Deeks stated sarcastically, but didn't miss the hurt that flashed on his partner's face at his harsh tone.

"Kensi, I'm sorry."

"It's fine. You're in a lot of pain" Kensi wouldn't meet his eyes.

"No, it's not fine. I know you are trying to help. Me being in pain is not an excuse."

Sam cleared his throat in order to break the mounting tension, "Who wants food?"

"I do, but can I get changed first? Doctors said it would be alright to wear my own stuff."

"Sure, I'll help you," Kensi offered.

"Oh, yeah. I guess I won't be able to do it myself." Deeks face dropped dejected.

"Would you rather I get a nurse? That way she can change your bandages too."

Fear crossed Deeks' eyes at the idea. He hadn't seen any of his injuries yet and wasn't sure what to expect. Kensi picked up on Deeks' mental path.

"How about I get a nurse, and I'll stay while they change them. I have seen them and know what to expect."

Deeks turned red at the suggestion she was making in front of their colleagues but knew her presence would keep him calm.

"We will just wait outside until you guys come and get us," Nell stated as she pulled Sam along behind her.

Kensi went to Deeks' bedside. She ran a hand through his hair lightly scratching his scalp; closing his eyes, he relaxed and nodded. Understanding, Kensi went to find a nurse to help with the outfit change and bandages.

"Mr. Deeks, I am going to need you to lie still. Changing the bandages may cause an increase in discomfort levels so try to bear with me, okay?" Deeks nodded, still nervous about seeing the extent of his injuries.

Slowly the nurse removed the wrappings around his torso. Deeks reached for Kensi's hand, trying to calm himself. She squeezed back reassuringly, noting the slight tremble her partner was experiencing from the rising pain levels.

Deeks glanced down at his now bare chest. Seeing the two yellow pins protruding from his collarbone made him feel dizzy and he quickly shut his eyes. Seeing horrific injuries on other people, he could handle. When it came to him being the patient, well that was a whole different story.

"Breathe, Deeks. Breathe," Kensi soothingly commanded. Deeks inhaled sharply trying to catch his breath but felt a stab of pain in his injured lung. Kensi squeezed his hand tighter and continued to stroke his head, realizing how much more relaxed the motion seemed to make her partner.

Rewrapping his torso only took a few minutes and soon the nurse was down by his leg, removing the blankets. Deeks, too curious for his own good, opened his eyes again. The brace had been removed and the bandaging was slowly revealing the black and blue blotted skin which lay beneath, but that wasn't what caused Deeks to groan. The red gash the spread across far too much of his inner thigh caught his attention. The bruising, despite how bad it was now, would disappear with time. The stitching, however, would leave a mark forever.

"It's horrible," he moaned.

"It'll clear up, Deeks," assuming he was just as upset by the bruising as she initially had been.

"No, the scar. It's so big."

Trying to be comforting the nurse added, "Well, the redness should fade over the years and the puckered skin will become more inverted."

Deeks just moaned some more.

"Seriously, Deeks? It's not like it'll show that often. Maybe in your board shorts," Kensi didn't understand why the scar was making such an impression on her partner. They all had them. Shoot, he had two where he had been shot previously in his chest.

"I know, but it's just so big. It's gonna take years for that to not be so noticeable. I have to look at it every day."

Kensi still didn't understand, and scrunched her eyebrows.

"What am I supposed to do with the ladies, Kens?!"

"You're kidding, right," Kensi deadpanned. The look on her partner's face, told her he wasn't.

"God, Deeks. That scar saved your life." Anger quickly rose in her voice, "You would be dead if they hadn't performed the surgery. Would you have preferred that? Huh?"

Deeks' eyes grew big at Kensi's flash of rage.

"Kens.."

"No, Deeks. Don't Kens me. Be thankful for that scar. I know I am," with tears of frustration she turned to the door.

"Please don't go. Kensi, I'm sorry." He tried to reach for her wrist but was limited by his shoulder. Kensi continued toward the door and walked out to meet Sam and Nell.

"Damn it!" Deeks bellowed, coughing from the strain on his lung. The nurse, not sure of what just happened, continued to re-bandage Deeks' leg. The detective felt himself losing control. He was in excruciating pain, his partner just walked out on him, and he knew it was his fault that she was upset. His eyes began to moisten and he titled his head back further toward the ceiling in order to unsuccessfully keep the tears at bay.

"All done," the nurse patted his leg and smiled as she finished tightening the brace. "Wanna get into those clothes now, hun?" All Deeks could do was nod.

"Aww, sweetie. She'll be back. From what I've heard she's only left to go home last night by her boss's orders. Really cares for you, that pretty thing does." Deeks just nodded again, totally dejected.

* * *

"He is such a pig!" Kensi stomped over to the chairs in which Nell and Sam were sitting. It was quite the change they had seen in Kensi since they first arrived at the hospital.

"His scar. A stupid, freaking scar and he only cares that it looks like shit. 'But Kens, what will the ladies think?'" Kensi mocked in a nasty tone. The other two members of OSP simply sat, staring at the ranting agent.

"Does he not care that he DIED? He died, God damn it! And the scar that saved his life, he goes on and on about how horrible it is." Tears are now flowing in a continuous stream. "It saved his god-damned life." Kensi collapsed into a chair placing her face in her hands as tiny sobs wracked her body. Nell hurried over to her friend, finding a soothing rhythm in which to stroke her hair.

"Kensi, maybe he was trying to lighten the mood. You know how Deeks is. He deflects pain with humor. Sometimes, albeit, not so well. I'm sure he is grateful to be alive." Sam just sat back uncomfortably, unsure of what to do.

Kensi glanced at Nell, who gave her a weak smile, "Come on, Kens. Let's go back and we can eat some dinner. Deeks needs us here. Specifically he needs you here."

"I'm not so sure," Kensi shook her head.

"Well, I am. So come on," she stated pulling Kensi to her feet and nodding at Sam to follow. Kensi made an attempt to straighten up and wipe her tear-stained face. The three soon arrived at Deeks' room and knocked to ensure he was dressed.

The nurse opened the door," Come on in. I was just leaving. Don't expect him to be up for too long, I just administered some more pain medication."

"He doesn't want that medication," Kensi snarled.

"I am aware, but it is protocol to deliver it after bandage changes and repositioning. Also Mr. Deeks was trembling from the pain. It is causing too high of stress on his body."

Kensi glared at the nurse, "Next time, ask him if he wants it, protocols or not. Ultimately it's his decision to make not yours."

The nurse nodded and quickly walked down the hallway, leaving the three at the entrance to her patient's room.

* * *

**Hey! Sorry for the late update. Homework is already sucking away all of my time. I hope Kensi didn't seem too off. I just feel that her emotions would be out of her control at points if Deeks died in front of her and he takes it lightly. Let me know what you think and review! Thanks for reading. Hopefully I can get another chapter up in the next few days.**


	10. Chapter 10

** A shorter chapter than usual, but hopefully it will get you guys through until I can write more. Classwork is already taking over my life!**

* * *

Deeks could already feel the negative effects of the medicine the nurse injected into his IV before he could refuse. His stomach was nauseous and the thought of Chinese food that was once so appealing, now seemed ill-inducing. He could barely hold his eyes open, as the overwhelming sensation of numbness began to seep deep into his bones. While the absence of pain was a blessing, the detective hated not feeling anything at all.

His hospital room door creaked open as Nell and Sam entered. Kensi stood back in the frame, unsure how to approach her partner after the scene she had made.

"How about dinner now, Deeks?" Sam asked innocently, holding up the bag of noodles. The mention of food instantly sent the detective reaching to cover his mouth, trying to hold down the itty-bitty Jell-O cup he had earlier consumed.

Seeing her partner's reaction, Kensi rushed to his side, grabbing the unused bedpan that sat near the medical equipment.

"It's okay. Just some side-effects of the medicine," Kensi comforted as her partner heaved what little stomach contents he had. Nell was sent into a panic, scared Deeks may cause more damage from the harsh convulsions his stomach was producing. Upset that he had caused the commotion, Sam sunk into the corner.

Deeks slowly relaxed and laid back into his bed, closing his eyes to stop the room from spinning. After a few minutes of quiet the detective opened his eyes. Upon opening his eyes, embarrassment flooded his features. Sam and Nell were staring at him wide-eyed, as Kensi looked on him with concern.

"Sorry, guys," Deeks mumbled.

"No problem, man. Sorry for the mention of, you know…" Sam trailed off seeing Deeks turning slightly green again.

"I told the nurse not to administer you any more meds without verbal consent from you," Deeks nodded in thanks to Kensi, glad that their earlier argument seemed to be forgotten.

"Yeah. I'd prefer to feel pain than nothing but nausea. Plus it makes me super drowsy." As if to prove his point Deeks sunk further into his bed and closed his eyes.

"Maybe we will just go. Kensi, here is your dinner should you want it," Nell offered.

"Thanks. Sorry, guys. He really was looking forward to your visit." Kensi replied, walking them to the door.

"No problem. He needs to rest anyways." With a parting hugs, the two OSP members left her with Deeks.

"Kens, I'm sorry," came a soft muffle from the bed.

"It's not your fault you got sick, Deeks."

"No, I'm sorry for before. About my scar. Humor is just the only way I know how to deflect—well, you know, pain and stuff. Except it wasn't funny. I hope you know I didn't mean anything by it."

Kensi thought about his reaction to the long red gash. It would leave a nasty scar, but it had also saved his life.

"Deeks, anybody who truly loves you won't think twice about that scar. I know I don't." The words slipped out before she could catch them. Pink spread up her neck and tinged her cheeks as Deeks' tired eyes widened a bit at her words.

"I mean, you know. 'Cause you're my partner and everything. It's more like a badge of honor or whatever," Kensi stumbled over her words to try and cover her previous statement.

"It's okay, Fern. I get it." Her partner graciously let the comment go, whether it be to save her from her embarrassment, or from the drowsiness caused by the drugs, she wasn't sure.

_It's true though. I don't mind. If anything, it's a reminder of how close I came to losing the most important man in my life. _The thought was a truth she could never deny.

_She doesn't mind it? It's hideous. Maybe I'm thinking too much into this._ With that final thought on his mind, Deeks drifted into unconsciousness again despite how much he fought against it.

* * *

Kensi decided that Deeks was in good hands for the evening and comforted by the fact that he was fully stable, she left for home shortly after he fell asleep. The agent decided to leave a note for Deeks, should he wake up without her there saying she would be back in the morning. She also made sure to remind the nurses that they were not to administer any additional drugs except in the case of emergencies without Deeks' consent first.

Once at home, Kensi reheated her Chinese that Sam had graciously picked up and ran a warm bath. Slipping into the tub with food in hand was the best way she could think to unwind after the day she had had. The morning started with Deeks and his coughing fit, but ended on the high note of him being moved out of ICU and considered stable. He had officially fought off his lung infection and despite becoming ill from the extensive medications, he was on the fast track to recovery.

Kensi sighed as she slipped a bit further down, placing her empty carton on the bathroom floor. As she tried to clear all thoughts of the past few days from her mind, her argument with Deeks continued to plague her. She knew that it was rare that he actually had dates anymore, but him mentioning the possibilities of women in his life (which honestly would happen, he was after all a very attractive man) Kensi felt her mood dip. She wanted to be the one he went to with his problems; for help. She had his back 24/7. Sure they got on each other's nerves and bantered back and forth but deep down she trusted Deeks. Trusted him more than she trusted Callen and Sam, and definitely more than Jack, which was hard to admit.

The partners shared a different dynamic. It was like magnets. They felt the other's pain and cared enough to listen. Yes, even Deeks had his quiet moments. But they also brought out the best in each other. Kensi relaxed around Deeks and had learned to goof-off, while her partner knew when to tone down the silliness and become serious.

So, yes, Kensi was severely bothered to hear how Deeks' conquests would disapprove of his scar.

_Ha. Maybe for the better._ Kensi thought selfishly. She was his best friend and he hers, but it couldn't always stay that way. Someone would eventually trump Kensi's ranking as most important woman in Deeks' life. Her heart sunk at the thought.

_What the hell is going on with me?! I can't feel these things. It's DEEKS!_ Kensi squeezed her eyes shut even tighter hoping the alien thoughts would be pushed from her brain.

Later that night as Kensi climbed into bed her mind worked overtime, making sleep impossible. She tossed and turned struggling to get a grasp on the new emotions taking hold. Should Deeks find another woman, she would take a permanent back-seat. No more movie nights, no more ice cream and beer. Instead of jealousy towards this imaginary woman, Kensi felt abandonment. She would lose Deeks. He would leave her.

_You don't have a claim on him!_ The reasonable side of herself screamed.

_But I want to…_

At that last thought Kensi sat up in bed, hugging her knees to her chest.

_But I want to…_ She repeated. She wanted a stake on her partner's heart, and selfishly so. She didn't want him to leave her for a pretty, busty blonde. She wanted him to herself. And Kensi was never good at sharing. Deeks would joke that she failed pre-school.

Although Kensi wasn't sure of her beyond-friends feelings for her partner, she knew she couldn't lose him to someone else. She couldn't be sidelined, but also had no clue what to do with these newfound ideas. Would Deeks want to keep dealing with her? Was she more a hassle than a benefit to him? He seemed to need her like she needed him. Maybe the feeling was mutual.

With the comforting thought Kensi drifted off, determined to open up to Deeks in the morning.


	11. Chapter 11

** Hey guys! I'm so excited about finally getting this chapter up! It's been sitting half-finished on my computer for a week now. As usual let me know what you think. It helps me keep Kensi and Deeks in character considering I don't follow the show super closely. Unfortunately this may be the last chapter for a while as things pick up at school. I will do my best to continue as fast as I can. I promise to finish this story! Thanks again for all of your gracious support.**

* * *

Deeks woke with a start, pain engulfing his senses. Maybe refusing painkillers had been a bad idea. Next time he would ask for a couple Advil instead. Not only was his thigh and lung on fire, but he realized that he was very, very alone.

The lights in his room were shut off and the hallway dimmed so patients could get some rest. He felt cloaked in the darkness, as if it were pressing in on him. It was times like these that he was taken back to his childhood, where he would hide under the bed, stifling breaths that may reveal his location to his angry father. Deeks was alone then too.

Slowly the detective was able to calm himself. Glancing around the room his eyes settled on a white paper on his bedside table. Gently, so as not to disturb his shoulder, he reached for it.

_Deeks,_

_Went home for a shower and sleep. Figured you would be okay for a bit. I promise to be back in the morning. Don't get into too much trouble while I'm gone._

_~K_

Well, that explained where his partner had gone. Even though she fully deserved the rest a bed could provide, he selfishly wanted Kensi to stay with him. She was good at keeping him calm. Deeks tried to hide the discomfort he was feeling from the nurses, but Kensi understood. She knew that he felt weak giving into the medications, and Deeks did not like feeling helpless. He was helpless as a kid and he did everything in his power to not be as an adult.

Now that he was completely alone, Deeks allowed himself a brief moment of discomposure. His face held a grimace as he tried to reorient his sore body on the uncomfortable, hospital mattress. Unfortunately, even the slightest movement sent white-hot heat straight to his collarbone. Rolling onto his side wasn't an option either, because of course, he just had to be injured on both sides of his body. Breathing even became an issue when deep breaths caught in his airway. Deeks let out a groan of frustration, feeling moisture build-up in his eyes. Once again he was the helpless little kid.

"God damn it" he muttered under his breath, trying to hold it together for no one in particular.

It was going to be a long recovery if this was only day three. But, the detective was determined. He was not going to be helpless. As if to prove a point to himself, he decided to try getting to the en suite bathroom to wash his grimy face.

Slowly, Deeks sat up, grasping onto his shoulder to support it, considering he lacked a sling. He threw off his blankets and gradually moved his good leg to the edge of the bed. In order to get to his feet, he had to move his damaged leg by hand. Considering the brace kept his knee fixed at a slight angle, Deeks only had motion at his hip. When he pulled his leg up to the edge of the bed he gasped in agony. He really needed to ask for some Advil if he was going to survive this.

Now pulling himself to stand and actually getting to the bathroom were his next obstacles. Knowing he couldn't support himself on his right leg, Deeks slipped to the edge of the bed until his left foot touch the floor. His body was exhausted and drowning in red, hot pain as he put his weight on his good foot, feeling the icy tiles below. The detective once again cupped his arm at the elbow to ensure no movement jolted his collarbone. This only disrupted his already precarious balance and he wobbled trying hard to stay off his right leg.

Eventually Deeks felt balanced enough to try to hop his way to the bathroom. It was only a few yards away, but at his slow pace and frequent stops for a breath it took him over five minutes to make his way there. Leaning up against the sink, he let go of his left arm and used the edge of the counter to support it. He waited for the forming black spots in his vision to disappear and then gently, he turned the faucet to hot, letting it get steamy. As he waited Deeks decided with all his efforts to get to the bathroom he may as well relieve himself and he shuffled a few feet over to the toilet.

Rinsing his face had never felt like such a relief. The warm water washed away the stresses and sweat of the past few days. Glancing into the mirror, Deeks sighed. He looked like hell. His usual scruff was now going on beard status and his blonde hair fell in greasy locks over his forehead. Being in critical condition he was not permitted showers. Even now, standing in the bathroom, he knew it would be a while before he would enjoy the comfort of warm water raining over him. Deeks would be too exhausted to stand there and it would be impossible for him to maintain balance and rinse himself at the same time. For the time being, he would have to deal with the occasional wet clothe the nurses had provided.

Home. That's all the detective wished for at this point. Home—where Monty greeted him and he could take as many showers as he pleased. Where he could walk to the beach or catch the perfect wave. That was all gone. At least for the time being. And he was alone. Truly, his only family were the members of OSP. Not one fellow officer from LAPD stopped by to see how he was doing. Although he was friendly with his neighbors, nobody knew much about him. And his real family was gone, his mom disappearing years before and his father dead.

Marty Deeks hated being alone. It made him miserable. He needed to talk, to act goofy, to hide from this dark side that seemed to always take hold when left to his own devices. Kensi was coming back, but God, between the pain and restlessness it caused, it was going to be a long few hours until the morning.

But she would be back and Deeks was comforted by the thought. He painstakingly made his way back to bed, thoroughly exhausted. And unexpectedly, as if receiving a reprieve from heaven, Deeks' fatigued body was drawn into unconsciousness despite the pain running like lightning through his veins.

* * *

"Deeks?" Came the quiet whisper, "Deeks?" A warm hand ran through his tousled hair as the detective slowly opened his eyes.

"Kens?"

"Sure thing, partner. I brought you some breakfast. Thought you might like a change from hospital food," Kensi said with an unusually warm and serene smile.

"Ughhh. Yes. Seriously why do they think people can live off of pudding and Jell-O here?" Deeks asked exasperated. The weakness he experienced the night before seemed to melt out of him as he looked into his partner's soft brown eyes.

"What?"

"What what?" Deeks smiled.

"You are staring at me, Deeks."

"You just seem, I don't know, happy this morning. It's nice." Kensi felt a blush heat her cheeks and shyly dipped her eyes thinking back to her decision to approach their unspoken "thing". It would be tough but Deeks was already so appreciative and understanding of her she felt a little bit more confident.

"Just glad to see you, I guess."

"I'm glad to see you too, Kensi." The sincerity of his words brought Kensi's eyes up to meet Deeks'. It was a moment in which usually one of them broke the tension with a joke, but something seemed to shift.

"I, um, I have bagels." The agent tore her eyes from Deeks' deep blue ones and held up the brown bag.

"Good. I'm starving." Deeks patted the bed next to him, indicating for her to slide in beside him.

"Deeks, I don't mind the chair. I don't want to hurt you."

"I don't want you in the chair, Princess. I was lonely last night. I want, no, need someone beside me right now." No jest was present in the worn detective's voice and he shot her his best puppy dog pout. Sighing she sat on the very edge.

"No. No. No. Slide up. That's not going to be comfortable for very long."

"Deeks, what if I hurt you?"

"Then, I'll adjust or let you know, Fern. Please scoot closer. Besides they set the thermostat at like 60 degrees in these rooms. I'm cold," he added with a cheeky smile.

_And there he is again_, Kensi gave him her classic eye-roll but crawled up beside him.

"Owwwwww" he bellowed.

Kensi shot like an arrow from the bed.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Do you need a nurse? What did I do?" too caught up in her frantic state, Kensi missed the huge grin that soon turned into hoots of laughter coming from Deeks.

"Kens, calm down. I was only kidding," Deeks managed between laughs and attempted deep breaths. Although it felt good to have a little fun, his body was certainly protesting.

"Deeks, if you weren't injured right now…"

"Don't even finish that statement, Princess," her partner interrupted. "I know you love me as I am. And if I didn't tease you, I wouldn't be me. I'll even give you a few free punches for when I get out of here."

Kensi sighed and climbed back up next to Deeks, tossing a bagel exasperatedly onto his lap.

"Eat."

"Yes, ma'am."

Silence filled the room as the pair ate their breakfast. Deeks was the first to speak, as usual.

"Sooo, any idea when I can jump this joint?"

"Nope. I'll ask a nurse today. It shouldn't be too much longer though since you haven't had many complications. You're feeling stuck aren't you?" Kensi questioned seriously. Deeks nodded in response, head down knowing too many emotions were flooding his eyes at the moment.

"Deeks. You don't have to hide from me," she placed a hand on his leg, "I know what it feels like."

"It's not just being bored, Kens. I am so locked up. I haven't gotten to shower. My beard is overgrown. I—I just want to be independent. To not be considered weak."

"God, Deeks. I don't think anybody here considers you weak. You survived massive trauma." Kensi grabbed his free hand and squeezed, fighting the urge to run a hand through his golden locks to comfort him. He was one of the strongest people she knew. He fought his whole life to be accepted, to be loved and yet nobody seemed to see the wonderful man she had grown to adore.

"I don't know. I just feel helpless. Like I'm only going to be a hassle to people. I've always been a hassle to people. To my parents growing up, to the LAPD, to you guys."

"Wait, wait. Who ever said NCIS thinks you are a hassle? You, Deeks, you are not a hassle." Kensi had turned her whole body towards him forcing his eyes to connect with hers. What she saw hurt her to the core. His eyes swam with need, anguish, and hopelessness.

Taking a risk, she dropped his hand and moved hers to cup his cheek, now thickly coated in a beard. Inhaling a deep breath the agent prepared herself for the conversation she feared would forever change their partnership.

"Deeks. Listen to me, because I may only have the strength to say this once, okay?" When he acknowledged her with a nod Kensi continued, "Deeks. You are the strongest person I know. You have been to hell and back, multiple times, and yet you still put on a smile and choose to live a better life. You fear your past and you let it weigh you down. You are scared of Max, that you may become him, but I know otherwise. When I look at you I see Marty Deeks, a person whose heart is bigger than all the rest. You are selfless and care more about providing for others than for yourself. When I first met you in that MMA gym I thought you were a pretty face," Kensi held up a finger to protest the interruption of a snide comment during her serious spiel.

"But deep down I felt there was something you were hiding. I now realize you hide your true self from the world to protect your heart. You hide behind jokes and take hits from others to gain approval. And while I will probably never give up on taking a chance to tease you a bit, I appreciate the real Marty Deeks even more. He is kind and gentle. You always look out for me, even when it's not necessary. You have taught me to relax a little and enjoy life instead of wasting it on the past. Deeks, there is nobody else I would want to watch my back on and off the field.

"When you—when you got shot," Kensi lifted her eyes to the ceiling trying to choke back the sob forming in her throat, "I lost it. I felt it was my fault," Deeks tried to stop her, to tell her otherwise but she continued, "I know you say otherwise, but just hear me out. You always do what I ask. What I want or need. But occasionally I want to be able to make you as happy and safe as you make me. And when you died in that ambulance, I thought I lost that chance.

"I lost my partner, my best friend, my beers and ice cream buddy," she chuckled through her now flowing tears. "Deeks, I need you in my life. It is hard for me to admit that. I haven't truly relied on anybody since my dad. But you have managed to worm your way into my heart and somehow no matter how hard I tried to keep you out, you stayed. And I will never be more grateful for your persistence. You saved me from my past, the darkness that hovered over me. I want to be that support for you too. I want to pull you from your past and let you see the beautiful brightness of your future. Because you, Deeks, you are a man that deserves whatever future he can dream up."

Kensi let out a deep breath, scared of Deeks' reaction to her proclamations. When she glanced up to look at him she had to smile. His eyes had glossed over with tears and a small grin lifted the edges of his lips.

"Thanks, Kens," was all he managed before reaching with his left arm to pull her into a tight embrace. She felt warm tears wetting he neck where he had nuzzled his head. She took the opportunity to run her fingers through his hair, a habit she had grown quite accustomed to. Deeks' body always relaxed under her touch and she felt some of the earlier tension ease away with her motions.

"It's the truth. Honestly Deeks. I don't know anybody stronger, with a more gracious heart than you. Despite your past."

"I want to let it go, Kens. I really do." His beard tickled her neck as he spoke into her shoulder.

"I want to help. Just let me help." She felt his small nod and sigh. The detective slowly lifted his head and gave Kensi a warm smile before leaning in and kissing her forehead. Just as his body had relaxed under her touch, hers responded equally.

"I would like that. Kensi, nobody in my entire life has ever made me feel more loved or appreciated than you have in the few short years we have been partners. I get happiness out of making you laugh that ridiculous laugh of yours and seeing you with Monty and teaching you to surf, but most of all I want is to see you happy. And if I can contribute to your happiness in any way, I am going to do it, come Hell or high water." Kensi smiled. Even when she wanted to selflessly help him, he turned it back to her happiness.

"Deeks, you are doing a fine job. I haven't felt this free, this open, in years. You have been able to heal so many old wounds without even knowing it. Let me do the same for you. Let me return the favor."

"I trust you." Three words that meant he was letting her in. Three words that could lead to so many places in their relationship. Three words that represented what she wanted to hear the most.

_I love you._


	12. Chapter 12

**Hey guys! Sorry for the major delay. Between school and writer's block it's been rough. Hope you enjoy this next chapter. I promise I'm going to finish this story eventually just bear with me =) **

* * *

"Today's the day! Today's the day!"

"DEEKS! Shut up, please," Kensi struggled to keep the smile off her face as she scolded her partner who was currently bouncing up and down in his bed.

"I can't, Fern. I'm just _that_ excited. I'm going home!"

"Yup. I know you're going home. I was there when the nurse told you."

"Yeah, but I'm going home." Deeks let out a joyful laugh. It felt good. He hadn't felt this happy in the week since his injuries.

A nurse walked in to see the detective's wide grin. She shook her head slightly at his lack of control.

"Mr. Deeks, I need you to hold still so I can show you how to properly place the sling for your collarbone and the brace for your leg." The man merely limited his bouncing to a lower speed, unable to keep still.

"Kens, I feel good as new! As if I could walk right out of here." Before either woman in the room could stop him, he swung his legs to the side of the bed and attempted to stand. Kensi was the fastest to react and grabbed her partner around the waist as his right leg gave out and the pain shot up into his thigh.

"Well, that was stupid wasn't it?" He questioned in defeat.

"Uh-huh," Kensi agreed with a smirk and nod of her head. Deeks seemed to think he was magically healed now that he was cleared to go home to finish recuperating.

"Remember that Hetty is the one that got you out of here early, Deeks, as long as we promised a babysitter for you 24/7." He scowled at her words.

"I don't need a babysitter, Kens."

"Well, considering you can't walk or use crutches because of your broken collarbone perhaps you do." Deeks let out an exasperated sigh clearly wanting his independence back. Slowly a mischievous grin spread over his face.

"Well Fern, if you're going to be my babysitter you're also going to have to give me baths and change my clothes." He winked while Kensi's face scrunched in disgust.

"Actually Mr. Deeks, it is highly likely that you will be unable to do both those actions on your own," the nurse decided to pipe in. Both partners' faces fell and a red burn crept up Deeks' neck.

"W-what? I can't even shower on my own. I mean I thought only getting rinsed in the sink was a thing you guys insisted on here, not in my own home! I literally haven't been fully clean in a week." Deeks' voice quieted in shame as he realized that he was nearly debilitated for the next few weeks because of that bastard, Crustoff.

"So nurse, what do you suggest? Just continue rinsing off or being like a child and have someone do it for me like you guys have been here? I'm a full grown man for crying out loud."

"Mr. Deeks, it is our jobs here to help you. Do not be ashamed of that. I know you want to be independent right now but honestly you could end up hurting yourself more. Your leg won't hold up in the shower and you can't get the pins in your collarbone wet so a shower is out of the equation even if you could place a seat in it. A bath is your only choice and with one hand and trying to keep part of your leg from being submerged it would be extremely difficult on your own," the nurse was becoming aggravated at her patient's stubbornness and it appeared in her harsh tone.

Kensi remained silent in the corner feeling her partner's pain. She would never want to have to be bathed by someone else. Not only is it uncomfortable but you lose all sense of autonomy. Her brain wracked itself for a plan: perhaps the guys would help, but even then Deeks' would be mortified. He already believes they find him the weak link and now he can't shower himself. She could do it but then that adds another layer to their "thing". It just seemed too inappropriate to help her handsome, muscular partner wash up. Kensi felt a slow burn fill her face as she shooed the ideas of a naked Deeks to the back of her mind. He was in pain about the situation and here she was lusting over him.

_Get a grip, Kensi!_ She chastised herself, fully aware of Deeks' eyes on her. He had caught the pink tint to her cheeks and curiously tilted his head to the side similarly to Monty.

"Whatcha thinking there, Kensalina? Me all helpless in the tub?" He let out a laugh and Kensi couldn't control the rise of flames again as she stumbled out a less then convincing "In your dreams."

"All the time, sunshine," he naturally retorted but his gaze remained analyzing. God, why out of all the people in the world, did he have to read her best?

"Anyways, Mr. Deeks," the nurse continued, clearly offended by the partners' interruptive exchange, "you will need to find someone you feel comfortable with to bathe you and help you out around the house for the next few weeks. Perhaps a girlfriend or family member?"

"Neither of which I have," mumbled the Detective.

"I'm sorry?" the nurse questioned not understanding what Deeks' had said.

"I said, I don't have either. I don't have family or a girlfriend to do all this stupid stuff for me. Can I at least try on my own?"

"I would advise against it."

"I know you would, obviously," Deeks' growing frustration had returned.

"But I will not be there to stop you." The nurse finished. Deeks' turned his head to her finding his loophole. He would just go it alone, like he always had.

* * *

With one crutch in hand for "short distances" and a wheelchair tucked neatly in the trunk of Kensi's SRX, Deeks' was on his way home for the first time in a week. He was excited to leave the hospital but the knot in his stomach reminded him that he was still helpless.

"So now that you're going home, what are you most excited to do?" Kensi tried to fill the awkward silence engulfing the vehicle but failed.

"Umm, seeing Monty, I guess. And sleeping in my own bed. I would say taking a nice long shower but obviously that can't happen." Her partner sighed and tilted his head against the window.

"You know, Deeks, I am willing to help if you need anything. You just have to ask 'cause I don't want to overstep my boundaries."

That got a laugh from Deeks, "Ok. First, when have you ever been concerned about boundaries," at that Kensi mentally inputted, _Trust me I set very high boundaries with you, we just always manage to cross them_.

Deeks' continued without knowledge of her inner monologue, "And second, did my beautiful partner just offer to bathe me? I knew you could resist my luscious locks and toned bod, Kens." He laughed turning everything into a joke as a protective instinct.

"Deeks, I don't want to see you suffer," Kensi said very seriously. "We could ask the guys to help you out if you feel more comfortable…"

"Wait, wait, wait! You seriously expect me to want Sam or Callen to bathe me. No freaking way! Uh-uh." Deeks furiously shook his head side to side.

"Well, then who would you feel most comfortable with. The nurse said you can't do it on your own."

"And what does that nurse know about me, Kens? Nothing. I've been doing things on my own since I was a kid. I think I can handle a shower."

"Are you sure you can't think of anyone? Maybe Eric?"

"Kensi, I know you're trying here, but honestly I want to just do this on my own." She gave a small nod, knowing she wasn't going to change his mind, but also feeling a little hurt that he was pushing her away again.

The two pulled into Deek's apartment complex and Kensi began to unload the wheelchair.

"Leave it, Kens. I'm not going to use it."

"Deeks, you have to."

"There's no point. I can't use it in my apartment. There isn't enough space. Plus hauling it up three flights of stairs would be just about the biggest pain in the ass."

"Ok. Are you just going to try to use the crutch then?"

"Yup." Deeks had already placed the crutch's foot on the ground outside the car and was swinging his legs out.

"Want any help?" Kensi automatically asked and her partner just shot her a glance. She put her hands up in surrender and her eyes held a silent apology.

Slowly he moved to rest his weight onto the crutch but was slightly off balance having to use it on the same side as his injured leg. Deeks managed his way to the stairs that would lead three flights up to his small apartment. He was already worn out and his muscles stiff from a week in bed and the thought of the stairs made him groan.

"It's alright, partner. Take your time." Kensi gave him a reassuring smile and Deeks felt a little bit of comfort return to him. At least Kensi wasn't cracking jokes about the situation like the guys would have been.

"Thanks, Kens."

Together, they very slowly climbed the stairs, resting at each landing. Deeks had a sheen of sweat covering his brow and began to stumble more the further along they went. Kensi had to grip his arm to stabilize him on a couple of occasions but he just tossed her a thankful smile and pressed on.

Finally, they reached his faded blue door. Deeks patted his pockets looking for his keys.

"I've got 'em," Kensi said reaching to unlock the door. As soon as it was open a crack, Monty sprang out and attacked his daddy, unfortunately knocking Deeks to the ground before Kensi could react.

"Shiiiit." Deeks bellowed and Kensi prayed the neighbors didn't hear. Monty continued to lick Deeks' face and bounce excitedly.

"Hey, bud. You need to get off daddy, okay? I love you too, but seriously…Kensi!"

"I've got him." Kensi grabbed Monty's collar and pulled him off her partner and shooed him back inside. Reaching down for Deeks she noticed his eyes were moist. The pain from the fall must have really shaken him up.

"Are you okay?" She questioned as she hauled him to his feet.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just wasn't expecting to get knocked on my ass by my dog." Deeks chuckled, but Kensi could see him biting back the pain.

Once inside, Kensi led Deeks to the couch and handed him the remote.

"Make sure to prop your leg up." Deeks nodded and began packing pillows under his foot on the coffee table.

"Do you need anything?" Kensi was reluctant to leave but wanted to allow her partner his space.

"No." Kensi turned to leave but Deeks called to her, "Kensi. I just—just um, thank you. You have been really great this week."

"It's what partners are there for…partner."

_Actually, I think it's way beyond partners_, Deeks kept to himself.

"Well, as a thank you, do you want to do movie night and take-out? Just something normal?"

Kensi's face lit up with a smile that her partner liked to think was especially for him. "I would love that Deeks. As long as you pay for the food," she laughed.

"Anything for you, Princess."


End file.
